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you do not even know how much the story you are scared to tell could help someone else out of their own isolated hell.
you do not even know how much the story you are scared to tell could help someone else out of their own isolated hell.
i do not need to change or mold myself just to make other people comfortable with me.
that is the thing about picking yourself up out of your own personal hell. no one sees how hard it was except you. all they see is that you, “finally got your shit together.”
that is the thing about picking yourself up out of your own personal hell. no one sees how hard it was except you. all they see is that you, “finally got your shit together.”
i am healing here. between the silence and the breeze. tending to wounds i have been afraid to see. healing for no one but me.
if nothing is forever, why does this pain never leave? why can i not move past something that is long gone? why can i not find relief?
i want to come out of this as someone that i do not recognize. finally taking off this disguise. because i am no longer afraid of being my true self for not only me but everyone else.
it is ok to be in the dark. in the unknown. in the messy in-between. there is so much good that comes from working on yourself in a place that lacks full clarity.
i am not the same person i was last year or the year before. and while that might seem scary because people stop recognizing me for who i once was. i remember that who i am changing into now is someone i always dreamed of.
some people can not handle the positive growth you are making. because it requires them to leave a comfort zone they have had with you for so long. it requires them realizing that you are no longer who you used to be and they do not really have anything in common with you now except past memories.
you told me i was broken. that it should not be this hard to be happy. why was i always sad? why was i always sleeping? you said i was broken, but really you were breaking me while simultaneously telling me i was overreacting.
you can ask everyone for advice, but at the end of the day only you know what is best for your life. only you know what direction is right.
second chances exist, but i stopped handing them out to the people who kept coming back for the third, fourth, and fifth time. and still expected me to welcome them with warm arms and an open mind.
if you knew me before five years ago and not anymore, you do not really know the me now. you have met me. you have interacted with me. but only a me that is just a ghost to the me today. who you think you know is so far away.
you have so many days left here. so many to see through. so many to get to. so many to enjoy. so many to hate. but those days are all stories to tell one day.
