healing for no one but me

by Jennae Cecelia

repeat after me; i am worthy of being here today exactly as i want to be. i do not need to change or mold myself just to make other people comfortable with me.

that is the thing about picking yourself up out of your own personal hell. no one sees how hard it was except you. all they see is that you, “finally got your shit together.”

this circle i have drawn around myself is filled with comfort and moving beyond the line is not easy. but how will i ever get anywhere new if i do not expand my circle?

dear me now, i know you are afraid that life will not go how you planned for it to be. that dreams you have will not be reached. that you will not move beyond the soil you have always found comfort in. but i am here to tell you that all the things you have played out in your mind, wished for one thousand times, are working out just as you always knew they would when you let go and trusted in timing. love, me next year

there is only so much healing i can do in this space that does not allow healing at my own pace, and only, “hurry up and just be ok.”

there are seeds in this soil i am waiting to see bloom. but i am forgiving and patient now, because i know how it feels to be rushed into something too soon.

the past is long gone, but sometimes it is a whisper in the wind reminding me that it helped me be who i am today. the good and the bad. the ugly and afraid. the past is not here to haunt it is here to remind me that i made it through the times i thought i never would escape. here i am with a future brand new.

i like dandelions better than roses. and barefoot walking more than wearing nice shoes. and you told me i am so simple and easy to please. that i can grow from any situation with ease. but really i just have learned i have to be adaptable to all that is around me.