Hating the Player (Campus Wallflowers #2)

by Rebecca Jenshak

I breathe a sigh of relief as I walk away. I did it. I survived a day in nature (okay, fine, it’s only been a few hours)

“Gavin!” I whisper-screech. “What?” “I heard something.” “Don’t worry. If they know what’s good for them, they’ll eat me first.” He doesn’t so much as open his eyes.

The three feet between us isn’t far enough. Outer space isn’t far enough. With Gavin, there is no empty space between us. Every molecule is charged and agitated.

“Try to look happier. You’re standing in front of a gorgeous view, and you look like you just shoved someone over the ledge.” “Oh, I wish,” I tease, but I pull out my best fake smile, one that I’ve honed over more than a decade of school photos.

“You were imagining pushing me off, weren’t you?” “No, too many witnesses.”

Her mouth moves like she’s singing along with music. Her black hair falls past her shoulders and she’s wearing a tank top and short shorts. Violet’s stunning always, but the glimpses of her like this are my favorite. She stills as if she can feel me watching her, and then looks right at me. I don’t look away. Couldn’t even for a million dollars. Violet lifts a middle finger in my direction and then turns on her heel and goes back to ignoring me.

I wish it didn’t hurt every time he finds a new way to crush my heart, but no matter how hard I try, I can’t make myself immune to him.

I’m at a loss for words. Of course, I’m fucking sorry. I’ve regretted it every day since.

“There’s no one I’d rather fight with than you, Vi.”

I’d never met someone like Violet before. From the very beginning she was just herself. Growing up with a famous dad, people (especially girls) sometimes get it in their head that being with me somehow makes them more important. I don’t get it, but it’s happened too many times to brush it off. Those people have become easy to spot. They want to know all about my dad, what it was like growing up and going to games, and they beg me to tell them about all the other celebrities I’ve met. And the real giveaway, they don’t share anything about themselves, or if they do, they’re the biggest basketball fan ever and want to prove it with game stats and anecdotes about my father. When I told Violet who my dad was, she shrugged and said, “That’s cool, but I’ve never heard of him.” That was that. She liked me, and I didn’t realize how rare that was until then.

My brain might know this is temporary, but my heart is punching to get out of my chest. It’s belonged to her since the first time I met her.

“Contrary to what you think, Vi, I care about you. If I thought you needed something, I’d do a lot more than kick down a door to get to you.”

“Get some sleep, Vi. I’ll be in yelling distance.” Her eyes fall closed, but a hint of a smile tugs at the corners of her mouth. “Just the way I like you,” she says. “Where I can yell at you, I mean.” “That’s the way I like it too.”

“Did you forget something?” “Just this.” His right hand reaches out and caresses my hip, then he seems to think better of it and pulls it back. He rubs at his palm with his other hand. “I like you, Violet. I’ve always liked you.”

Number one, my parents never had that. Or at least not as far back as I can remember. Number two, I want that. And I can only picture it with one person.

She’s here out of obligation and misconstrued guilt, which pisses me off for some reason. Maybe because I want to be her friend. Nah, fuck that. Not her friend. I want to be her everything.

And after a year of wishing for a second chance, I finally have a date with Violet.

Gavin and I were a blip in time, but it was such a great blip. Until we weren’t.

It scares me how easy it is to be with him again. Hating him was simpler.

Regardless, I like that Gavin’s smile, rare as it may be aimed at me, never feels anything but authentic.

Honestly, same. Except the more time I spend with Gavin, the harder it is to remember that this is a truce, and not us picking up where we left off.

“It took a couple of minutes for it to register, or I would have immediately agreed.” He holds the door open for me, and something in his playful smile and dark brown eyes holds me captive as he says, “I always hear you, Violet.”

She crosses the room with long, confident steps. Violet is a freaking ten any day of the week, but tonight, in that blue dress with her hair wavy and those shoes… damn those shoes, she steals the air from my lungs.

It’s hard to pull back out of her space. Being in her bubble feels a hell of a lot better than being anywhere else.

“I bet she picks yours.” “Based on what? You haven’t even seen it.” “I don’t need to. I know you.”

“It wasn’t in your head, though. I’ve never met anyone like you or had such a strong pull toward someone.” I rub a hand over my chest. “Those weeks we were talking are filled with some of my best memories. Whatever you want to believe about me, know that it wasn’t in your head.”

How can I still want him even after he crushed my heart?

My mouth opens to ask a whole bunch of questions, but I turn off my brain. When a hot girl asks you to kiss her, you fucking kiss her and you kiss her good.

She unbuckles and opens the door. I’m still struggling to get brain function back when she says, “No, Gavin. I don’t think you and I can ever be friends.”

“I tried to move on.” A million times over the last year. I dedicated myself to school and having fun with my friends, but… “He’s too far under my skin.”

It isn’t our first kiss, but it feels bigger than all the others. It feels thought-out and intentional instead of reactionary.

“I wanted you.” He traces my bottom lip with the pad of his thumb. “I fucked up, but I have always wanted you.”

“Hey. Let’s play a game.” “A game? Now?” “Mhmm. Two truths and a lie.” “Okay.” I give him a tentative smile. “Number one, I have the hottest girlfriend alive.” “Two, I can’t imagine my life without you.” “And three?” I ask. “I have been in love with you since the night your sandal broke, and I carried you to your dorm.” My heart threatens to burst in my chest. “Which one is the lie?” “None of them.” He grins. “They’re all true.”

I’ve never seen my girl so happy. She hits me with a smile that makes the world feel simple and good, and then lunges at me, throwing her arms around my neck.