Good Inside: A Guide to Becoming the Parent You Want to Be

by Becky Kennedy

Close Your Eyes Hack I’m not usually a fan of parenting “hacks” or “tricks” because they tend to prioritize short-term compliance over long-term connection and skill building. But that’s not the case with one of my all-time favorite strategies, the Close Your Eyes Hack. This trick gives our kids the core elements they need in order to want to listen to us—it infuses respect, trust, independence, control, and playfulness all at once. Here’s what it looks like: “I am going to close my eyes”—then place your hands over your eyes—“and all I’m saying is that if there is a child with his shoes on when I open my eyes . . . oh my goodness, if there is a child all Velcroed up . . . I just don’t know what I am going to do! I am going to be so confused! I may even—oh no oh no—have to do a silly jumpy dance and wiggle all around and I may even fall on the floor!” Then pause. Wait. The chances of your child’s running to put his shoes on just skyrocketed. Why? Because now your child is in charge. He feels in control rather than like he’s being controlled. Your child feels you trust him because you’re not watching (even though you may be peering through your fingers), and you’re adding in silliness and the promise of doing something absurd—what kid doesn’t love to watch a parent dance and fall down and look ridiculous?