Behavior: A child is tantrumming about wanting ice cream for breakfast. Parent Response #1: “I won’t talk to you while you have a fit. Go to your room and come out when you’re being reasonable!” Attachment Lesson #1: When I want something, I push people away, I become bad, I am left abandoned and alone. People only want to be around me when I’m easy and compliant. Parent Response #2: “I know, sweetie. You wish you could have ice cream for breakfast. That’s not an option right now. You’re allowed to be upset about it.” Attachment Lesson #2: I am allowed to want things for myself. Wanting things
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