Behavior: A child is hesitant to join a birthday party, clinging to his mom. Parent Response #1: “You know everyone here. Come on! There’s nothing to be worried about!” Attachment Lesson #1: I can’t trust my feelings because they’re ridiculous and overblown. Other people know better than I do how I should feel. Parent Response #2: “Something about this feels tricky. I believe you. Take your time. You’ll know when you’re ready.” Attachment Lesson #2: I can trust my feelings. I’m allowed to feel cautious. I know what I am feeling and I can expect other people to respect and support me.
