I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki

by Baek Se-hee

I have always wanted to be alone, yet always hated being alone.

When I tell a story, I tend to exaggerate because I want the other person to laugh, and when I want to sympathise with someone’s story, I’ll say, ‘I’ve gone through that, too,’ and lie to them.

Just because you like one thing about a person, you don’t need to like everything about them. And just because you don’t like one thing about a person, it doesn’t mean the person as a whole isn’t worth your time. I think you should get in the habit of thinking differently.

choose things you haven’t chosen before – try to enter situations, even ones you know will end in failure, just to experience failure.

Fear increases when it’s something that you keep to yourself. Instead of suffering alone, it can often be good to share it with someone else, like you’re doing now.

Sometimes, when someone tells me to ‘Cheer up’ when I’m going through a tough time, I just want to wring their neck. Just be there to hold my hand, be sad or angry with me, or if you’ve gone through something similar, tell me about it and say it will all pass eventually. That’s empathy and communication and a kind of consolation that enriches relationships.