The Serpent and the Wings of Night (Crowns of Nyaxia, #1)

by Carissa Broadbent

“You’re worried about my self-control? How sweet.” He leaned close enough that I felt his words skitter over my cheek. I didn’t know why I didn’t move. “I have plenty of self-control, Oraya,” he murmured. “Don’t you worry about me.”

This kingdom was a part of me, and I, whether it wanted me or not, was a part of it. I was the daughter of its king, blood or no. The bones of my parents were buried in this country. No matter how many times the House of Night bruised my skin or my heart, I would stay. Just as all the humans who lived here—who did not have a choice but to live here—would stay.

Let myself think of my parents, crushed in a broken building in a war that had nothing to do with them. Let myself think of a little lost girl with dark hair hunted in a maze. A little girl with dark hair left alone in a ruined city. Let myself think of a lifetime spent here, trapped by my own fear, trapped by these fucking predators, these monsters, these things that didn’t see me as anything other than livestock—

And then I realized. I realized that fear, when embraced, hardens and sharpens. That it becomes rage. That it becomes power.

Raihn. He was on his knees, staring up at me. And that—the way he looked at me—was the first thing that felt real. Real, and raw, and… and confusing. Because he looked at me in sheer awe—like I was the most incredible thing he had ever seen. Like I was a fucking goddess.

She hid her tears, grabbed her clothing, and ran. She did not look back when he called for her. Her broken dream and her broken heart tore her flesh to pieces.

“Now that I can’t place my bets on the two of you together, I wonder who I should put my silver on next time? Someone uneducated might think it would be easy for you to kill her, Raihn, but I think Nessanyn has a good chance of—oh, I’m sorry.” Another one of those smiles. “It’s Oraya, isn’t it? I’ve always been bad with names.” Nessanyn?

“Some would call you a dangerous person.” The corner of his mouth curled. “Not with you.”

“Don’t be so quick to throw away your humanity, Oraya,” he said. “You might find you miss it once it’s gone.”

You’ve kept the compassion. It doesn’t matter if your blood runs black now. That hasn’t changed you.”

“I’ve lived through some injustices in the last couple of centuries. Seen some fucking travesties. But one of the biggest, Oraya, is that anyone taught you that you should become anything other than exactly what you are.”

But even more frightening than his desire was mine. I felt that call echoing in my own pulse. It was so strong that when he finally released me—when I finally backed away from him and turned away without another word—I had to resist the urge to lick his touch from my fingertips. Maybe it would taste as metallic and hot as blood.

Taste.” I eyed the spoon. It looked like some kind of stew, with chunks of vegetables and liberally applied spices suspended in a thick, creamy-brown sauce. I lowered my head and tasted it. Fuck. My knees almost gave out. Whatever words I was about to say collapsed into a jumble on my tongue, melting beneath the—the—Mother, there weren’t words for the flavors. I’d never tasted anything so good. When I finally came back to my senses, I blinked and looked at Raihn, who was watching me with a strange, bemused expression. “That wasn’t how I’d imagined making you come for the first time,” he remarked.

Im fucking dead

I wanted his magnificent length inside of me, taking me so deep I couldn’t remember my own name, and I wanted him to remind me of it when he came. I wanted to watch him go.

“Don’t fucking touch her,” he growled as black light cracked through the air, his Asteris awoken with fresh power.

“Let him go right now or I’ll fucking kill her, Raihn! Another Nessanyn. Do you want that? Let him go!” Raihn stilled.

Vincent’s seemed closer as it whispered to me, You made it so far, little serpent. But at least your bones will lie in your homeland. My palm pressed to the gritty, ashy sand, fingers loosely closing around a handful of it. I wondered if the bones of my family were here in this dirt, too, ground down to nothing but dust.

A command. The young woman could not disobey her father’s orders. She had done so only once, and now look at what had happened.

Years later, when the girl was a grown woman, she would decide that the boy did not mean to hurt her that night. That he had not yet understood his newly Turned vampire impulses. It did not change what he did. It did not make it any less unforgivable. It only made vampires more dangerous. They could love you, and still kill you.

Now she understood. This was more than just a lesson. It was punishment. She had disobeyed her father’s tenets. She had allowed someone else into her heart. And now, he would force her to carve it out and lay it at his feet.

Strange, that girls are so often told that the loss of their virginity marks a threshold between girlhood and womanhood, as if it fundamentally alters them in some way. It was not the sex that changed the girl forever. Not the blood that spilled between her thighs that shaped her. The blood that spilled over that marble floor, though… Those are the stains on one’s innocence that never fade.

The line between anger and sadness is so thin. I had learned that fear can become rage, but rage can so easily shatter into devastation. The fractures spiderwebbed across my heart.

And above all, he had loved me. I knew this. There was nothing Raihn could say to convince me that he didn’t. Vincent’s love was truth like the moon was truth.

My knuckles were white around the handle of my blade, which still protruded from my victim’s chest. This piece of shit felt it for five seconds. For five seconds in a lifetime of centuries, he felt that powerlessness. When it had been bred into us, tattooed into our souls, for our entire brief pitiful existences.

“What’s that face for, princess?” I could not lie to him. So instead I said, “Kiss me.” And—Nyaxia fucking bless him—he did.

His words from earlier echoed in my head: You have destroyed me. He had destroyed me, too. Perhaps it was good that we would die tomorrow. Because I didn’t know how to remake myself after this.

A fucking list. The most beautiful word in the Goddess-damned world.

But in this moment, I came to the horrifying realization that I would never be able to carve Raihn from my heart. He had embedded too deep. Roots through stone.

I thought about kissing him one last time. Thought about winding my arms around his neck and never letting go. Dragging him back to bed and refusing to leave. At least we’d die happy when Nyaxia struck us down.

“No. Don’t stop.” I unsheathed my other blade. “Fuck them. Don’t let them mock you. Give me a fair fight, and I’ll give you a fair death, Ibrihim.”

No, there was no other trick here. Just three animals in a cage with each other. But who needed a gimmick when we were already giving them this? A human, an outcast, a monster. Lovers forced to turn on each other. A heartbroken mourner rabid for vengeance. It was already a hell of a show.

Nothing existed except for him and the light I had just snuffed out of this world.

“So many mistakes in the end,” he choked out. “Never you.”

“I took Vincent’s kingdom,” Raihn snarled. “I took his life. I took his title. And now, I will take his daughter. I’ll make her my wife. Keep her close, where I can keep an eye on her. And I’ll make sure it hurts when I fuck her, just like it did when he raped our queen two hundred years ago.”

HUH?!