I felt like someone had kicked my legs out from under me. The weeks of stress, of worry… somehow in the middle of all my obsessing over the time, my time had disappeared. My space for sorting through it all, for making plans, had vanished. I was out of time. And I wasn’t ready. I didn’t know how to do this. How to say goodbye to Charlie and Renée… to Jacob… to being human. I knew exactly what I wanted, but I was suddenly terrified of getting it.