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I didn’t have to look to know who it was; this was a voice I would know anywhere—know, and respond to, whether I was awake or asleep… or even dead, I’d bet.
Well, Gran, you might have noticed that my boyfriend glitters. It’s just something he does in the sun. Don’t worry about it.…
(College was Plan B. I was still hoping for Plan A, but Edward was just so stubborn about leaving me human.… )
He was gone.
A new moon.
OCTOBER
NOVEMBER
DECEMBER
JANUARY
TIME PASSES. EVEN WHEN IT SEEMS IMPOSSIBLE. EVEN WHEN each tick of the second hand aches like the pulse of blood behind a bruise. It passes unevenly, in strange lurches and dragging lulls, but pass it does. Even for me.
I smiled back, and something clicked silently into place, like two corresponding puzzle pieces. I’d forgotten how much I really liked Jacob Black.
Jacob was a gift from the gods.
It was Jacob himself. Jacob was simply a perpetually happy person, and he carried that happiness with him like an aura, sharing it with whoever was near him. Like an earthbound sun, whenever someone was within his gravitational pull, Jacob warmed them. It was natural, a part of who he was. No wonder I was so eager to see him.
He was my best friend. I would always love him, and it would never, ever be enough.
“I’ll be very quick. You won’t feel a thing, I promise. Oh, I’ll lie to Victoria about that later, naturally, just to placate her. But if you knew what she had planned for you, Bella…”
I tensed for the spring, my eyes squinting as I cringed away, and the sound of Edward’s furious roar echoed distantly in the back of my head. His name burst through all the walls I’d built to contain it. Edward, Edward, Edward. I was going to die. It shouldn’t matter if I thought of him now. Edward, I love you.
My good vampires were never coming back; how soothing it was to imagine that the other kind could also disappear.
“You asked for it,” he growled at me, eyes glinting hard. “If you want to blame someone, why don’t you point your finger at those filthy, reeking bloodsuckers that you love so much?”
“Werewolf,” I gasped.
“So, you’re the vampire girl.” I stiffened. “Yes. Are you the wolf girl?”
Goodbye, I love you, was my last thought.
She rolled her eyes. “He was a fool to think you could survive alone. I’ve never seen anyone so prone to life-threatening idiocy.”
And the last seven months meant nothing. And his words in the forest meant nothing. And it did not matter if he did not want me. I would never want anything but him, no matter how long I lived.
“Before you, Bella, my life was like a moonless night. Very dark, but there were stars—points of light and reason.… And then you shot across my sky like a meteor. Suddenly everything was on fire; there was brilliancy, there was beauty. When you were gone, when the meteor had fallen over the horizon, everything went black. Nothing had changed, but my eyes were blinded by the light. I couldn’t see the stars anymore. And there was no more reason for anything.”
