“It was a weekend-long event out of state, so we’d make a small vacation out of it rather than do the four-hour drive there and back every day. This particular year, I didn’t want to go. I was seventeen and the parents of the person I’d been secretly hooking up with happened to be going out of town that weekend. We’d been having sex at that point, nothing more than stolen moments in the woods or behind a dumpster somewhere, though. I was teeming with testosterone. No way I’d pass up an opportunity for a sex marathon—in a bed. So I bribed Brandon to take my place with Dad.” He pointed to
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