Discipline Is Destiny: The Power of Self-Control (The Stoic Virtues Series)

by Ryan Holiday

Doing the right thing almost always takes courage, just as discipline is impossible without the wisdom to know what is worth choosing. What good is courage if not applied to justice? What good is wisdom if it doesn’t make us more modest?

Will we be selfish or selfless? Brave or afraid? Strong or weak? Wise or stupid? Will we cultivate a good habit or a bad one? Courage or cowardice? The bliss of ignorance or the challenge of a new idea? Stay the same . . . or grow? The easy way or the right way?

Freedom, as Eisenhower famously said, is actually only the “opportunity for self-discipline.” Unless we’d rather be adrift, vulnerable, disordered, disconnected, we are responsible for ourselves. Technology, access, success, power, privilege—this is only a blessing when accompanied by the second of the cardinal virtues: self-restraint.

We must master ourselves unless we’d prefer to be mastered by someone or something else.

We can say that each of us has a higher and lower self, and that these two selves are in a constant battle with each other. The can versus the should. What we can get away with, and what’s best. The side that can focus, and the side that is easily distracted. The side that strives and reaches, the side that stoops and compromises. The side that seeks balance, the side that loves chaos and excess.

Self-discipline is giving everything you have . . . and knowing what to hold back. Is there some contradiction in this? No, only balance. Some things we resist, some things we pursue; in all things, we proceed with moderation, intentionally, reasonably, without being consumed or carried away.

Temperance is not deprivation but command of oneself physically, mentally, spiritually—demanding the best of oneself, even when no one is looking, even when allowed less. It takes courage to live this way—not just because it’s hard, but because it sets you apart.

Discipline, then, is both predictive and deterministic. It makes it more likely you’ll be successful and it ensures, success or failure, that whatever happens, you are great. The converse is also true: a lack of discipli...

His greatness, like all true greatness, was not rooted in aggression or ego or his appetites or a vast fortune, but in simplicity and restraint—in how he commanded himself, which in turn made him worthy of commanding others.

Eisenhower quite literally conquered the world by conquering himself first.

Under closer inspection: No one has a harder time than the lazy. No one experiences more pain than the glutton. No success is shorter lived than the reckless or endlessly ambitious. Failing to realize your full potential is a terrible punishment. Greed moves the goalposts, preventing one from ever enjoying what one has. Even if the outside world celebrates them, on the inside there is only misery, self-loathing, and dependence.

Name someone truly great without self-discipline. Name one calamitous undoing that was not, at least in part, rooted in a lack of self-discipline.

Freedom requires discipline. Discipline gives us freedom. Freedom and greatness. Your destiny is there. Will you grab the reins?

Our body is our glory, our hazard and our care.

In a world of abundance, each of us must wrestle with our desires, our urges, as well as the timeless battle to strengthen ourselves for the vicissitudes of life. This is not about six-pack abs or the avoidance of all that feels good, but instead about developing the fortitude required for the path we have chosen.

he had the same voice in his head that all of us do. He just cultivated the strength—made a habit—of not listening to it. Because once you start compromising, well, now you’re compromised .

He knew that getting comfortable was the enemy, and that success is an endless series of invitations to get comfortable. It’s easy to be disciplined when you have nothing. What about when you have everything? What about when you’re so talented that you can get away with not giving everything?

“When a man can control his life, his physical needs, his lower self,” Muhammad Ali would later say, “he elevates himself.”

You have to do your best while you still have a chance. Life is short. You never know when the game, when your body, will be taken away from you. Don’t waste it!

The body, you must understand, is a metaphor. It’s a training ground, a proving ground for the mind and the soul. What are you willing to put up with? What can you do without? What will you put yourself through? What can you produce with it?

The truly dedicated are harder on themselves than any outside person could ever be. Temperance is not a particularly sexy word and hardly the most fun concept, but it can lead to greatness.

Wake up. Show up. Be present. Give it everything you’ve got.

“Is this what I was created for?” he asks of his reluctance. “To huddle under the blankets and stay warm?”

Yes, it is nicer under there. But is that what we were born for? To feel nice? That’s how you’re going to spend the gift of life, the gift of this present moment that you will never have again? “Don’t you see the plants, the birds, the ants, and the spiders and the bees going about their individual tasks, putting the world in order, as best they can?” he said to himself but also to us. “And you’re not willing to do your job as a human being? Why aren’t you running to do what your nature demands?”

When you have trouble waking up, when you find it hard, remind yourself of who you come from, remind yourself of the tradition, remind yourself of what is at stake. Think, as Morrison did, of her grandmother, who had more children and an even harder life. Think of Morrison herself, who certainly did not have it easy, and still got up early.

The pleasure of excess is always fleeting. Which is why self-discipline is not a rejection of pleasure but a way to embrace it. Treating our body well, moderating our desires, working hard, exercising, hustling—this is not a punishment. This is simply the work for which pleasure is the reward.

We are meant for more than simply existing. We are here for more than just lying around and seeking pleasure. We have been given incredible gifts by nature. We are an apex predator, a freakishly elite product of millions of years of evolution. How will you choose to spend this bounty? By letting your assets atrophy? This isn’t just a personal choice. It affects us all.

The body can’t be in charge. Neither can the habit. We must be the boss.

By being a little hard on ourselves, it makes it harder for others to be hard on us. By being strict with ourselves, we take away others’ power over us.

The insecure constantly pressure us to be like them.

Ask yourself: Haven’t I and humanity survived quite a long time without this? How did it go last time I got the thing I craved—how long did the feeling last (compared to the buyer’s remorse)? And how will you know that this thing won’t actually make your life easier? Because the last thing didn’t either! Go check your junk drawer or the back of your closet for proof.

The less you desire, the richer you are, the freer you are, the more powerful you are. It’s that simple.

If we want to think well and work well, it doesn’t start with the mind. It starts with walking around and cleaning up.

“I tell my students,” Toni Morrison explained, “one of the most important things they need to know is when they are their best, creatively. They need to ask themselves, What does the ideal room look like? Is there music? Is there silence? Is there chaos outside or is there serenity outside? What do I need in order to release my imagination?”

Build the perfect environment

Imagine what you could get done if you had the discipline to proactively put everything in order first. If you committed to orderliness and enforced it on yourself. Don’t think of that as another obligation, another thing to worry about. Because in practice, it will free you.

Be regular and orderly in your life, so that you may be violent and original in your work.

The modern conveniences we can trace to his lab then, owe far more to his body than his brain, to the compounding power of consistency rather than sheer brilliance. It wasn’t about inspiration. It was about getting to work.

You don’t have to always be amazing. You do always have to show up. What matters is sticking around for the next at bat.

You cannot be great without the self-discipline to do that. One thing a day adds up. Each day adds up. But the numbers are only interesting if they accumulate in large quantities.

By ignoring the little things, we make ourselves vulnerable.

Is anything made better by inattention? the philosopher Epictetus would ask. Of course not! Whether you’re a carpenter or an athlete, an investor or an infantry officer, greatness is in the details. Details require self-discipline. Even if nobody else notices . . . or cares.

We hustle because you never know—when it will make a difference, when someone might be watching, when it might be our last try, when “the slows” might cost us everything.

Hustle isn’t always about hurrying. It is about getting things done, properly. It’s okay to move slowly . . . provided that you never stop.

We don’t rise to the occasion, we fall to the level of our training.

When you are not practicing, refining, working—somewhere, someone else is . . . and when you meet them, they will beat you.

But that’s what the greats do, they don’t just show up, they do more than practice, they do the work.

“I come from a part of the world where people did work rather than just talk about it,” she said. “And so if you feel that you just can’t write, or you’re too tired, or this, that, and the other, just stop thinking about it and go and work.”

If you do it right, it’s also torture not to do it. The sled dog gets anxious if it doesn’t get to wear its harness. The horse wants to go out and trot. The bee dies if cut off from the hive. When you find what you’re meant to do, you do it.

Always and forever, the reward is the work. It is a joy itself. It is torture and also heaven—sweaty, wonderful salvation.

Decide who you want to be, the Stoics command us, and then do that work. Will we be recognized for it? Maybe, but that will be extra.