Twentieth Anniversary Screening

by Jeff Strand

“It was the fastest I’ve ever told somebody to go fuck themselves. I spelled ‘yourself’ wrong because I was in such a hurry to click send. Then I sent it again in all caps. I couldn’t believe he was asking me to do this. We all know how it turned out, but even if it had turned out great, even if the audience had a fun time, it was a fucked-up idea. It’s hard to believe that anybody bought a ticket, much less that the theater sold out. Who are these people? What’s the matter with them? What traumatic events shaped their childhood?”