I noticed that I often derailed the conversation and changed the subject when I didn’t understand something he was saying. And often when I was confused, I didn’t ask for clarification. Instead, I reflexively assumed that he was criticizing me. I’d jump in and interrupt him, apologizing for my bad behavior. I said a lot of unkind things about myself. At multiple points, I rambled incoherently. I noticed one occasion where I was blabbering on about Joey’s job of all things. I made a comment: “What the fuck am I talking about. Where am I?” Dr. Ham responded, “YES! This is the aftermath of
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