Queen of Myth and Monsters (Adrian X Isolde, #2)

by Scarlett St. Clair

“I cut off his head. The blade was dull.” I was not surprised by his choice of weapon or the brutal way in which he’d chosen to execute the former king of Revekka, and because of the last two days, I had no trouble imagining him hacking away at Dragos’s neck until his head rolled. “And I kept it on a pike outside the gates where our treasonous dead are now. His body lay beneath it, and it was picked apart until it was nothing more than bones.” “And the bones?” I had not imagined he would give Dragos the satisfaction of a burial in any form. “Look closer at my throne the next time we hold court,” he said.

The creature was an aufhocker. Once a dog, it had likely been bitten or killed by another of its kind. Normally, they hunted at night, but this one bared bloody, razor teeth, its eyes aglow as it watched me approach.

“Once again, you choose your queen over your people,” said Gesalac. “Is my love for Isolde your only critique of my reign? If so, I will have to assume you are jealous,” I said. “Are you in love with me, Gesalac?” The vampire’s eyes narrowed. “You murdered my son.” “He is not the first son I have murdered, nor, I imagine, the last, but let us not pretend that your vengeance is fueled by fatherly devotion. You want my throne, my empire.” He chuckled. “What empire? What kingdoms have you conquered since you began fucking that woman?” I managed a smile despite how hard I clenched my teeth. “My queen and I will conquer this world, and when we have our empire, we will fuck on a bed of your bones.” Gesalac smirked and began to circle. “You may need a queen to rule your kingdom, but Isolde needs no king. You will make her into a monster.” “You say that as if it is a bad thing.”

As I landed on the traitor, he twisted, using one of the fence poles as a weapon. Its sharpened end slammed into me, piercing my armor, sinking deep into my chest. My scream was more of a roar as my body seized, shaking from the shock of my injury. Gesalac threw me back and I struck the ground hard. But I was already working the wood free, and once the stake was out, I threw it aside, hands covered in my own blood. I curled them into fists, my eyes locked with Gesalac’s. He had managed to get to his feet, hands clasped around the end of my blade, which protruded from his chest as he attempted, in vain, to pull it from his body. “I’m finished here,” I said. “It is time for you to kneel.” At my command, the traitor’s knees struck so hard, the ground shook. His eyes widened as I approached. “H-how did you—” “When I stand before them, I can control the mind of any vampire I’ve turned,” I said, gripping the hilt of my blade. “Pity you did not know.” He cried out as I pulled my sword free and then shoved it into him again—and again and again, even as he lay facedown in the mud. Though I knew the wounds would heal soon after they were free of my blade, all that mattered was that he felt pain. “My king,” said a voice, and I recognized it as Daroc. I ignored him a second longer so that I could shove my blade once more into Gesalac’s back. Once it sunk to the hilt, I stepped back, coming face-to-face with my general. “Restrain and mask him,” I said, breathless. “Tonight we will cele...

“I did not spend two hundred years yearning for you, killing for you, conquering for you, to watch you make stupid decisions. You are mortal.” “Then maybe I shouldn’t be.”

“You were hurt,” I said. Adrian’s eyes found mine. “Were you worried for me?” His question made me angry. “Of course. You are not the only one who fears losing someone.”

Then I submerged myself beneath the water, and there was no pain as I felt my body transform and become a foreign thing—an animal, covered in thick black fur. Reemerging, I crept to the shore on all fours, holding Adrian’s gaze as I sat, allowing a long, black tail to curl around my feet. The corner of my husband’s lips lifted. “Aren’t you a beautiful beast?” he said. I narrowed my eyes at him, allowing a growl to escape my mouth. I did not appreciate his humor so shortly after becoming the very same creature that had killed so many of my people. I had become an aufhocker. I was an omen of death.

“You are not the only shifter in this kingdom, Isolde,” Adrian said. “There are others like you.” “Sorin is a falcon, not a—” “Monster?” Adrian cut me off. “But he is a monster. We all are, and we all have sides of us we must learn to control. You are no different. You never have been.” I clenched my jaw hard. Right now, I did not feel like controlling myself. I wanted to tear him to shreds. I wanted to eviscerate him with my words. I wanted to lash him with my tongue. And he must have been listening to my thoughts because he laughed. “I would take the tongue-lashing,” he said, “if it meant I could fuck you on your stomach.” “You haven’t even tried to understand my fear,” I said. “What makes you think I would let you touch me?” Adrian’s gaze hardened, and it was my turn to smile, though there was nothing entertaining about this.

“Men want power,” Ana said. It was the first time she had spoken, and everyone at the table turned to look at her. “Women want to exist without fear.”

Adrian moved my hair, exposing my neck, and pressed a kiss to my skin. “I am sorry,” he said. “For earlier.” “You’ll have to do more than kiss my neck to apologize,” I said. “Earlier you did not desire my touch,” he said. “Earlier you were a bastard,” I said. Adrian chuckled, but his hold on me tightened and he spoke near my ear. “I do not fear monsters as you do,” he said. “I do not want to lose my mind,” I said. “I have turned many mortals into my kind. Some are shifters and some are not, but none have ever lost their minds.” “You did not change me,” I pointed out. “I could,” he said, and once more, I felt his lips touch my skin. “I would. You have only to say the word.”

“Have you ever turned anyone the way you plan to turn me?” I asked, a question that made me feel both embarrassed and guilty. I tried not to be concerned with who Adrian had fucked before me and should not care how he had turned anyone before me either, but it felt different. I knew by how he spoke that he valued this above anything, so why did it matter? “I have never changed anyone in the way I will change you.”

“You wanted a quiet life with me at the base of this mountain,” he said. “We would have a farm and you would teach magic the way it was meant to be taught.” “How quaint,” I said, managing to laugh despite how much I cried. The irony wasn’t lost on me—the life I had wanted then and the life I had now. “You named our children,” he said, and the silence that followed his statement shattered my heart. They were the children we would never have. “What were their names?” I whispered. I knew he remembered, knew he clung to the memory of them though they never existed. “Cora, for a girl,” he said, and I swallowed something sharp and jagged in my throat, only to have it land uneasily in my stomach. Cora. I thought the name was so buried, I could hardly recall where I had heard it, but once the seed was planted, a woman formed around the name. She had a proud face and stood stoic and still. Her eyes were dark, both humble and fierce. She was beautiful, and an ache settled deep inside me at the fact that I did not know what had happened to her in the aftermath of my death. This was Yesenia’s mother. My mother. “Cora,” I repeated, and my brows lowered as I searched for the other name. Finally, I met Adrian’s gaze. “Alek. For a boy,” I said. “After you.” A ghost of a smile touched his lips but could not dim the pain in his eyes, and after a moment, he spoke. “I am sorry I could not give you what you wanted,” he said. “Adrian,” I whispered. His words broke me in a way I hadn’t been befo...

“Anything for you,” he said. “Promise me the world,” I said, breathing hard. “It is yours,” he said.

“I thought you didn’t read,” I said. Sorin met my gaze, the serious expression he had worn while reading fading away into a sweet smile. “I distinctly remember telling you I was kidding, my queen.” I matched his smile. “May I join you?” He sat up straighter and closed his book. “Of course.” I sat beside him on the cushioned bench. “What brings you out of your bed at this hour?” he asked. “I needed a break from Adrian,” I said, rolling my eyes. Sorin chuckled, eyes glittering. “Exhausting, is he?” “If you are referring to the words coming out of his mouth, then yes,” I said. Sorin laughed louder. “And you? Why are you out here?” “Ah, well,” he said, smile fading, the cover of his book suddenly seeming far more interesting. “I am giving Daroc a break.” “I have a feeling it isn’t his words you are tired of,” I said. Sorin shook his head. “The only time he speaks is when I’ve done something he doesn’t approve of.” “I’m sorry,” I said. “I suppose you should be. It was your husband who put him in such a poor mood,” he teased.

“We have court,” I said, trying to turn toward him, but he held me in place. “Adrian,” I said, growing frustrated, and he chuckled against my skin. “Yes, my queen?” “Do not pretend you do not know what you are doing.” “I’d rather you explain,” he said. “That you are making me furious?” He laughed again. “I like your fury,” he said, hand lifting to my neck. “Let me taste it.” Just as his lips crashed against mine, someone cleared their throat, though Adrian was in no hurry to stop his assault on my mouth until I pushed against his chest. Daroc stood at the door that led into Adrian’s study. His eyes were fierce, his face like stone. I thought of my conversation with Sorin and wondered if his frustration came from their fight or Adrian’s obsession with me. “We’ll open the doors if you are ready, Your Majesties,” he said. “Does it look like we are ready?” Adrian asked, annoyed. “You cannot have me in the throne room before court, Adrian,” I said. He raised a brow and I knew what he was going to say. “That is not a challenge,” I said, stepping away from him and heading for my throne. “We are ready, General.” Daroc nodded and closed the adjoining door. As I turned to sit, I found Adrian still standing at the base of the dais staring at me. “Yes?” “Nothing, my sweet,” he said. “I am only imagining what it will be like when I fuck you on this throne before my court.” I could not help the smile that tugged at my mouth. I straightened my back and crossed one leg over the other. I w...

I was only halfway down the hall when Adrian called my name. “Isolde!” His boots thudded against the floor in pursuit. “Isolde!” He caught up with me and yanked my arm, forcing me to face him. I slapped him, hard. “How dare you,” I seethed. “What would you have me do?” he hissed furiously. He held my shoulders, bending over me. “Did you not see what was happening in that room?” “You wax poetic about how excruciating it was to watch me burn alive. You begged to be a monster so that you could avenge me. You say you will not live another lifetime without me by your side, and yet you welcomed a witch-hunter into these halls.” I did not even recognize my voice as I spoke, and there was a part of me that knew he had no choice, but I could not handle his reasoning in this moment. “Will you watch me burn again?” “You aren’t even a witch!” he yelled, his body shaking. “You have no power beyond driving me to the fucking edge of insanity.” I tried to hit him again, but he held me too tight, so I did the only thing I could to escape him—stab him in the heart. I shoved my hands against his chest and released my blade. The second it pierced his skin, he let me go, and I watched his blood darken the fabric of his tunic. “Fuck you,” I said. This time when I left, he did not follow.

“I am so tired,” I said. “And I know that is not fair because you have lived this life longer than me…but I can’t—” My voice faltered. “You do not have to have lived a hundred years or even twenty. If your soul is tired, you will be tired.”

How would I ever apologize enough? I felt that I had committed so many wrongs against her in just the last few days, I would never make up for them. I had failed to be compassionate when she had shifted for the first time; I had dismissed her worries and connection to her mother’s homeland; and I had not been able to control my court long enough to prevent her harm. I prayed for her, I begged for her—and yet, I could not take care of her.

“Sometimes I fear you will not value me as much as you valued her,” Isolde said. That comment surprised me, and I felt a rush of anger that she would even say those words aloud. She had never expressed insecurity over this before, and it frustrated me that she would now. “I value you,” I said. “It is not as if you are two different people.” “But we are,” she said. “You cannot refuse to see it just because you wish Yesenia had never died.” “How often must I assure you of your role as my queen?” I asked tightly. “As often as I require,” she snapped, and there was a flush to her cheeks that made me think she was either embarrassed or angry—perhaps both. “You know why I feel this way.” “I am not your father.” “Words do not heal trauma,” she said. “Then tell me how I heal this.” “You don’t. You love me through the fear, even when my doubt hurts, and I will do the same for you.” There was a beat of silence, and I rose to sit beside her on the bed. “I have loved you across lifetimes. Why would I stop now?”

“What will you do about Solaris?” she asked. I lifted my head and looked at her. “I don’t like his name in your mouth,” I said. “I don’t like his presence in my castle,” she countered. “Should I feel offended that you are thinking about him so soon after our lovemaking?” “Is your confidence so lacking?” I chuckled and then kissed her. After a moment, I answered her question. “I will kill him. When the time is right.” “When will that be?” I stared down at her, sensing her anxiety. “I won’t let him hurt you,” I said quietly. Her eyes were dark. “Adrian,” she whispered, shaking her head. “He already has.”

“How did you shift the first time?” Sorin asked. I paused, uncertain if I should be truthful. I still remember how I had woken up, desperate to fuck and so hot. “I…was having sex with Adrian.” “Huh,” he said, an amused look in his eyes. “Have you tried that again?” “You know, Sorin, turning into a dog is usually the furthest thing from my mind when I am fucking.” “It was only a question,” he said. “Everyone has different sexual tastes. I am not here to judge.” I glared. “I will stab you. I have no qualms.” “No one knows that better than Isac,” he said, and then he sighed. “I suppose we will have to do this the hard way.”

“It’s all right,” he said, but it wasn’t. Someone had destroyed something Adrian loved, and it felt deeply personal. And yet as if he did not wish me to know how much it affected him, he added, “There will be other fish.” I frowned at him and he raised a finger, smoothing my frustrated brows. “There is only one you,” he said and helped me to my feet. “Come with me. I want to take you somewhere.” I was wary. This seemed too spontaneous. “Where, exactly?” “Let it be a surprise.” I hesitated, not because I did not wish to go with him but because I was anxious at the thought of leaving Cel Ceredi with everything that had happened since Ravena’s attack. “We will not be gone long,” he said and hooked his arm around me, drawing me close, his hand tangling in my hair. “Please, Isolde. I want to see you happy.” My brows lowered, confused by his words. “I am happy with you.” He studied me for a moment, and I watched his lips as he strung his explanation together. “I have never seen you smile at me the way you did with Killian last night in the great hall.” I could not imagine that was true, but I felt as though he believed what he was saying, which made me sad. Did I scowl at him so much he forgot when I smiled? “I want to be the reason for that smile,” he said. “Let me try today.” I did not know what to say because I wanted to say so much. “Just say yes,” he whispered, reading my thoughts, and with his lips so close to mine, my resistance unraveled, and I relented. “Fine. Surprise ...

“What happens if you stay in the sunlight?” I asked. “I burn,” he said, and he lifted our entwined hands into the sunlight. I watched them, his pale skin contrasting brightly with my own. It took a few minutes, but soon blisters appeared on his skin, and those quickly burst, turning into red sores, and sizzled. My hand shook as he held it, and I jerked it from the light. “Stop!” I turned toward him, examining his arm, but it was already healed. His laugh was breathless as he guided my eyes to his, tilting my head with his fingers. “Do you worry for me, my sweet?” he asked. “What a ridiculous question,” I said.

“We should have never let him stay,” I said. Adrian’s jaw ticked. “Do you intend to lecture me?” “It is too late for that, don’t you think?” He slammed his hand down on the table and stood. “Fuck!” He began to pace, predatory in the way he moved. “I will have to make him into a noblesse,” he said. I sat up straighter. “Why would you do that?” “He has left me little choice in the matter,” Adrian said. “At least if he is a noblesse, he is seen as part of my circle. If he remains separate, he is a threat.” “I thought we agreed that you would not take on noblesse based only on their usefulness.” “We agreed to nothing,” he said. “You gave your opinion.” “Which you clearly did not value enough to consider.” “Value has nothing to do with it,” he said. “This is political, Isolde. Solaris has publicly petitioned to become a noblesse, he has already created division, and tonight he illustrated an ability that goes beyond any power I possess. Our people will not understand why I would deny him.” “Your decision to turn him would be rash,” I said. “We do not know who Solaris truly is or what he wants. He may claim to have powers granted by Dis, but there are always consequences to resurrecting the dead. If you wait, Solaris will destroy himself.” “And what do we do until then?” he snapped, standing. “Let our people follow like sheep to the slaughter?” “You have had no problem waiting when it comes to my people,” I said. “I suppose it only matters when your reign is being threatened by ...

“Perhaps you should reflect on why you are always apologizing to me,” I said. “And change.”

“King Dragos keeps a pleasure house in the dungeon of the Red Palace,” she explained. “He says it is for his lords, says they will perform better if they have a place to spill their seed.” She spoke with her bloody teeth clenched, her disgust barely contained. “The lords are free to go any time so long as they bring a new boy or girl every month. They have kidnapped hundreds, and I have only helped a few escape, but tonight as I was trying to free a girl, I was caught.” Her voice broke and she shook, tears streaming down her face. She pulled her hands from mine and started to wipe her face, but I stopped her. That only seemed to make her cry harder. “They raped me,” she whispered and then spoke through her teeth again, shaking with hate. “Every. Lord.” Tears spilled down my cheeks. I had no words. There was no comfort for this—not even in revenge—because trauma was a nightmare that clung to its victims with an iron fist. “Then they killed her,” she said, and then she wailed. “They killed her because of me.”

“He says he heard a growl and thought it was an aufhocker. Then he heard another and thought it might be a pack. When he shifted, he found he was surrounded by villagers, and by then, you had all been attacked. They were lying in wait.”

Perhaps I was foolish to keep fighting for others and should only fight for myself.

“I do not understand what happened at the lake.” “There is no understanding it,” Adrian said. “Because it is hate, and hate can exist with no reason.” “It shouldn’t,” I said. “We were only trying to help banish the thing they feared.” “You were,” he said. “And they did not deserve it.”

“She died for nothing,” I said. We never even managed to finish the spell. “I should have never asked her.” “You cannot blame yourself for her choice to help.” “Perhaps I should blame myself for thinking we could cast a counterspell at all,” I said. “Or you could honor Violeta and acknowledge that it was an incredibly brave thing,” Adrian said.

“Did you know about Dragos’s pleasure house?” I asked. Adrian kept staring at Ana. “We all did,” he said. “It was impossible not to know.” “Why didn’t you do anything?” “You assume I did nothing?” he asked, looking at me. I supposed I had. “I’m sorry.” He shook his head. “I likely did not do enough,” he said. “I was focused on killing Dragos. I thought if I succeeded, then every bad thing he’d done would go away. I didn’t realize until after Ana’s…” He paused and cleared his throat. “I didn’t realize how awful it had become until…until then.” “You planned to kill Dragos? Even before my death?” “It’s the only reason I joined his guard,” Adrian said. “It was not easy…pretending to be so loyal.” “What did he do to you?” Adrian swallowed, and let his eyes fall to his hands, which he had clasped tightly in his lap. “I blame him for destroying my family. Revekka was once very small, and Dragos wanted more land, more power. He declared war upon three other countries. They were called Bren, Kazan, and Oksana. My father was called upon to fight, and when he returned, he was not the same man. He was angry, and he drank, and that made him violent. One day, he walked into the woods and impaled himself upon his sword. I found him. I was only a boy. After, my mother, too, began drinking, and she whored herself around to sustain it rather than feeding me.” He paused a moment, letting his hands rest on the arms of his chair, gazing toward the window. “One day, she didn’t come home. They f...

“Listen and listen well,” I said, my voice low and threatening. “I am going to give you one more chance to accept what I have to offer. If you refuse, I’ll keep you here forever. Just like this. You’ll grow old, naked and alone, and every day you will think about this night, when I offered you a world outside this cell. Now, what will it be, Safira?” She jerked from my grip, and I released her, but her fight was soon gone. Her shoulders fell and she looked very tired. “You are offering a bath,” she said. “What else?” My lips curled. “Are you bargaining?” “If I am to trade this life for another, I want to know what I’m getting.” “Well, I would not mind another lady-in-waiting,” I said. She would never replace Violeta, but there was something very sharp about Safira. She was knowledgeable, and she had her pulse on palace gossip, which would greatly benefit me. Her brows rose. “Why would you want me as your lady? I am your enemy.” “A woman who wants to sleep with my husband does not make her an enemy, Safira. It makes her annoying.” She crossed her arms over her chest, resigned. I took a step away. “Come along.” I walked out of the cell, and Safira followed without protest.

“Yesenia.” Vada cupped my face between her cold and wrinkled hands. Her palms were softer than mine. They always had been. Vada had never planted her own herbs or harvested them. “We will not survive if we are not docile.” “Is survival worth it, then?” I asked. “When you have someone to live for, no sacrifice is too great,” she’d said. But then we had gone on to give up our power, our autonomy, our lives, and we had lost those we loved anyway. “You cannot believe that you have true power just because you sit upon a throne and wear a crown,” said Ravena. “Adrian treats me as his equal,” I said. “You do not know the man you married,” she said. “Adrian sees a use for you just as he sees a use for everyone else he allows into his life. He just happens to fuck you.” “You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, my fingers tightening around the hilt of my blade. “You think Adrian wants to be free of Dis?” she asked. “What he really wants is to take her place.” “What’s so wrong with being a god?” I asked. “It’s not becoming one that’s the problem; it’s who has to die for him to get there.” She paused, and then said, “But you know he is dangerous. Or at least you did—he’s why you created the book.” “You’re lying,” I said, but the shock of her words straightened my spine and I hated how truthful they felt. She smiled and shook her head. “I am many things, but I have never been a liar, Yesenia.” “Time changes people, Ravena,” I said, and I reared back and shoved the blade towa...

“This would be a really great time for you to shift, Isolde,” he said, gritting his teeth. “Maybe if I’d had a better teacher,” I returned.

When he opened them again and gazed upon me, his treason only hurt worse because I did not see the hate I wanted to see. I saw regret and sorrow and deep, deep sadness. “Adrian is becoming more and more a monster every day,” he said. “Tell me you have not seen the signs. The flash of white in his eyes, the pain in his head. It is Dis taking over. It is Dis speaking to him.” “How do you know it is Dis?” I whispered, my mouth quivering. I did not know if it was from my anguish or shock. “Isolde,” Sorin said, shaking his head. “Don’t,” I said between bloody teeth. “Do not say my name.” Sorin nodded and then spoke. “He’ll hurt you one day, and then you will understand.” “He would never,” I said with such conviction in my voice. I began to cry. “I really do love you,” Sorin said. “I wish you could remember…this is for the greater good.” Those words. My father had used them.

“Adrian.” I whispered his name, lifting my blood-stained hand to his face. “What happened? Where is Sorin?” he asked. “Sorin did this,” I said. “Sorin is a traitor.” “No.” I heard another voice I recognized as Daroc’s, but I could not turn my head to look at him. My eyes were heavy, and my hand fell from Adrian’s face, leaving a streak of blood. Adrian reached for it, pressing my palm to his cheek again. “I will heal you.” “Adrian,” I whispered, smiling at him. “Not even you can heal this.” Adrian’s venom was powerful, but it had limits as we’d had learned with the aufhocker bite. “Unless… You must change me,” I said. I recognized there were consequences, but none came close to dying. Adrian’s eyes passed over my face, as if he were assessing just how much I wanted this. “You are certain?” “It is either that or die,” I said. “I no longer wish to be a sparrow.” There was no hesitation after that.

“What is the greater good?” Adrian asked. “A world without you,” I said, quiet and sad.

“Ravena said I wrote The Book of Dis to destroy you,” I said. The words were like blades scraping my throat, and yet Adrian did not seem at all surprised. I felt his fingers against my jaw, forcing my gaze to his. “I have no doubt that you did,” he said. “Adrian—” I did not know what to say. “If you do destroy me, it will be because of Dis,” he said. “You’ll remember that, won’t you?” “What are you saying?” “I am saying I am no longer the favorite of the goddess’s creations.”

I heard her laugh in my mind—the sound like a chime, far too beautiful for her wickedness—and then she spoke. “Just because you do not say my name does not mean I do not know what you are up to, my pet.” Another shock of pain lanced through my head, and I fell to the floor, unable to move. “Tell me how you think you can be free of me when I created you,” she hissed, and it felt as though she were in my ear. I turned my head toward her voice, and while I could see nothing, I knew she was here because she was the darkness. She was the night that fell upon the world and the inky sky between the stars. “I gave you everything, even your lover. Shall I take her back?” “You wouldn’t dare.” “I would dare,” she said. “Do you think our pact means anything to me when you are plotting a way to destroy me? If she dies, she dies, and you will not follow. This world is your hell to live in, Adrian. You have created it.” “If you touch her…” I began, but my voice trembled, unable to carry out the threat I wanted to make. “What?” Dis snapped, her darkness sinking into my hair, pulling it back. “What will you do, Blood King? Will you beg Asha for vengeance against me? I am afraid she has found her own path forward.” “What are you talking about?” “I am not the only one who can create an incarnate, Adrian,” she said. “Did you forget what you really are? My hand upon this world. What power do you have that I did not grant?” I had no answer, and my hate for her deepened. “Pray to me, Adrian, and...

“Did you need something?” He opened his mouth to speak but hesitated, and I realized he’d come to talk about Sorin. “I did not know,” he began. “I swear to you. I—” “I never thought you did,” I said. “I would like your permission to hunt for him,” Daroc said. I was quiet, studying him, uncertain this was the choice he should make so soon after his lover’s betrayal. “And what will you do when you find him?” I asked. Daroc swallowed. His eyes were so red, they looked as if they were filled with blood. “I will kill him.” “For me?” I asked. “Or for you?” He opened his mouth to speak, but instead, he seemed to hold his breath. “Would you really wish to exist in this world after you murdered your lover?” I asked. I knew vengeance would come for Sorin, but I did not think it right for Daroc to take up the gauntlet, and I would never ask it of him. “Former lover,” he said, a bitter note to his voice. “All the same,” I said. “You love him.” His mouth trembled. “I wish I didn’t,” he said through clenched teeth. Because then I would not have to feel this pain. I heard what he did not say aloud, the words lodging in my heart like a knife. I knew a version of this desperation because I had felt it when Yesenia died.

“Do you think I will have a world to rule at the end of all this?” I asked. Daroc’s brows rose at the question. “Yes. What else are we working toward?” I shook my head slowly and met Daroc’s gaze. “Sometimes I can’t remember.”

“I have information for you, my queen,” Gavriel said. “About the Sanctuary of Asha.” “Please, tell me,” I said. “The priestess who claimed that Asha had sent her a vision of their salvation is named Imelda. She says the incarnated woman has great power, matched only by that of the Blood King.” I knew Imelda. She was the head priestess of the Sanctuary of Asha. She had married Adrian and I, but outside that, my only interactions with her had been her attempts to berate me for not setting a better example as princess of Lara and sole heir.

“This world is afraid of powerful women.”

“Kill me,” he said. My brows lowered. “What?” “If she takes me again, if I hurt you again,” he said, “kill me.” I started to shake my head. “You do not know what you are asking of me.” “I do,” he said quickly. “Do not let me live with the guilt of having murdered you.” “So you would rather I live with it?” I asked. The words slipped angrily between my teeth. He said nothing, but I already knew his answer.

“I love you,” he said. I smiled and placed my palm against his cheek. “Why does it feel like you are saying goodbye?” “I just want you to know,” he said. “I want you to always know.” I knew what he was doing—it was not a matter of just in case, it was a matter of when I lose control.

“Nadia.” Blood spattered her face as I said her name. “Why?” “You are no longer my child,” she said. “My Issi died the night she had to marry that monster.”

“Well, isn’t this devastating.” I froze, lifting my head at the sound of Ravena’s voice. “First you lose your father,” she continued. “And now the woman who treated you as a daughter.”

“You did not incarnate in this life to be Isolde of Lara. You incarnated to seek revenge as Yesenia of Aroth, and that revenge must be against men. They hurt you.” “You hurt me,” I said. “Not like them,” she said, and there was an edge to her voice, as if she were insulted I had compared the two. “I know you sometimes mourn for the life you didn’t live, but it was not just your life that was taken the night you burned.”

“Ana, I can’t be pregnant.” “You very well can be, Yesenia.” “You do not understand—” “I know you’ve said it before, that you are going to die—” “I am. Dragos asked if he would conquer the world, and I foretold that his attempt would end in his demise,” I said. “He will murder me, Ana.” Her lips slammed together and her jaw tightened. “Then you must flee,” she said, as if it were that simple. I shook my head. I had seen the future, seen my death at the stake, but why had I not seen life? My chest felt as though it were being ripped to shreds. I pressed my hands to my stomach and then hugged myself, tears streaming down my face. “How did I not see this life?” I asked, my voice broken. Ana rose and placed her hands on my shoulders. “You can change the course of the future, Yesenia. Perhaps you did so here.” I wanted to believe her, and perhaps stupidly, her words gave me hope. “I don’t know what to do,” I said. “Adrian will figure it out,” Ana said. “But first, you must tell him.” Ravena came back into focus. She stood opposite me, and it was the first time I’d ever seen any kind of expression on her face beyond hateful smugness. I remembered the rest of that night. Adrian and I had fled to the cottage under the mountains where we would spend a final night together. It was the same place Adrian had buried the bones of High Coven. It was where we had been captured, where Adrian had been beaten and where Dragos had raped me. “I never told him,” I whispered, staring at Ravena n...

“Dis hates me,” I said. “She hates you because she loves Adrian,” said Ana. “Then why did she allow me to incarnate again?” “To keep him on her side,” said Ana. “Though I think you know it is too late for that. That is why she takes control of him, to remind him that he is a pawn.” “And instead of destroying Dis, you wish to destroy Adrian?” “There is no other way, Isolde,” she said. “I don’t believe you.” “Isolde—” “There has to be another way!” I screamed, my pain and anger tearing from my chest. “Adrian is Dis upon this earth, and when we were powerful—when witches ruled the earth—we could keep the power in check, but too many of us are asleep.” “Then let’s wake them up, Ana!” She shook her head. “Look at you, one of the most powerful witches of our time, and you can barely wake up. You are so terrified.” “You do not want anyone more powerful than you,” I snapped. She shook her head. “You love him too much to see the truth.” “The only truth I see at the moment is how you betrayed me.” “One day, you will understand,” she said. “And then we can work together to bring balance to this world.”