Poor Richard's Almanack

by Benjamin Franklin (Richard Saunders)

and has threatned more than once to burn all my Books and Rattling-Traps (as she calls my Instruments) if I do not make some profitable Use of them for the good of my Family.

(I am far from speaking it with Pleasure) is soon to be removed, since inexorable Death, who was never known to respect Merit, has already prepared the mortal Dart, the fatal Sister has already extended her destroying Shears, and that ingenious Man must soon be taken from us.

A house without woman & Fire-light, is like a body without soul or sprite.

He's a Fool that makes his Doctor his Heir.

Love well, whip well.

Unfortunately, I just read that elsewhere today......:(

The poor have little, beggars none, the rich too much, enough not one.

Distrust & caution are the parents of security. Tongue double, brings trouble.

He is ill cloth'd, who is bare of Virtue.

There is neither honour nor gain, got in dealing with a vil-lain.

Time eateth all things, could old Poets say; The Times are chang'd, our times drink all away.

Avarice and Happiness never saw each other, how then shou'd they become acquainted.

He that has neither fools, whores nor beggars among his kindred, is the son of a thunder-gust.

Pox take you, is no curse to some people.

Poverty, Poetry, and new Titles of Honour, make Men ridiculous.

it will be of no Service to any body to know what Weather it is 1000 miles off, and therefore I always set down positively what Weather my Reader will have, be he where he will at the time.

He that can compose himself, is wiser than he that composes books.

The noblest question in the world is What Good may I do in it?

Upon looking over the Months, I see he has put in abundance of foul Weather this Year; and therefore I have scatter'd here and there, where I could find room, some fair, pleasant, sunshiny, &c. for the Good-Women to dry their Clothes in. If it does not come to pass according to my Desire, I have shown my Good-will, however; and I hope they'll take it in good part.

Since I cannot govern my own tongue, tho' within my own teeth, how can I hope to govern the tongues of others?

Each year one vicious habit rooted out, In time might make the worst Man good throughout.

she looks wistfully for a while right forward. He judges rightly what she's about: And having calculated the Distance and allow'd Time for

The Vain Youth that reads my Almanack for the sake of an idle Joke, will perhaps meet with a serious Reflection, that he may ever after be the better for.

Historians relate, not so much what is done, as what they would have believed.

Sin is not hurtful because it is forbidden but it is forbidden because it's hurtful. Nor is a Duty beneficial because it is commanded, but it is commanded, because it's beneficial.

Finding you asleep, I entred your left Nostril, ascended into your Brain, found out where the Ends of those Nerves were fastned that move your right Hand and Fingers, by the Help of which I am now writing unknown to you; but when you open your Eyes, you will see that the Hand written is mine, tho' wrote with yours.

Who says Jack is not generous? he is always fond of giving, and cares not for receiving. -- What? Why; Advice.

Let thy discontents be thy Secrets; -- if the world knows them, 'twill despise thee and increase them.

Bess brags she 'as Beauty, and can prove the same; As how? why thus, Sir, 'tis her puppy's name.

All that these angry Folks can say, will never provoke me to tell them where I live. I would eat my Nails first.

One good Husband is worth two good Wives; for the scarcer things are the more they're valued.

_ How few there are who have courage enough to own their Faults, or resolution enough to mend them!

Dick told his spouse, he durst be bold to swear, Whate'er she pray'd for, Heav'n would thwart her pray'r: Indeed! says Nell, 'tis what I'm pleas'd to hear; For now I'll pray for your long life, my dear.

Experience keeps a dear school, yet Fools will learn in no other.

I'll warrant ye, goes before Rashness; Who'd-a-tho't it? comes sneaking after.

Hear Reason, or she'll make you feel her.

Epitaph on a Scolding Wife by her Husband. Here my poor Bridgets's Corps doth lie, she is at rest, -- and so am I.

It's common for Men to give 6 pretended Reasons instead of one real one.

He that whines for Glass without G Take away L and that's he.

A Father's a Treasure; a Brother's a Comfort; a Friend is both.

What signifies your Patience, if you can't find it when you want it.