From the Jump

by Lacie Waldon

No. For only two tiny letters, the word is strangely compelling. Intoxicating even. No. It sounds so firm. So decisive. I whisper it silently, and my tongue clicks off the roof of my mouth in a satisfying way, even as my chest tightens.

I glance up at the sun, which has begun its slow descent. It’s still bright with the joy that spring brings, and I realize it must have been a beautiful day. The air is crisp with the promise of a new season.

a responsible person should invest in property instead of spending on rent—but it’s not crazy. I could do it responsibly. I’d just have to think of it as an investment in my dreams. My dreams—for once—not the dreams I’d been instructed to have.

I have spent the entirety of my adult life doing everything in my power to curate my existence. Not once have I considered inserting sharks into the picture.

I’m looking at a man who has the flirting capabilities of a twelve-year-old because he’s never had to develop his game.

But now it’s just me, trying to figure out what I want to do, or say, and it’s freeing, but it also feels like I’m taking steps that might not be able to be retraced.”

The walls are as far from white as it gets; every area is a different color, although they all go together in a unique way. It’s like they’re from the same family, but one where some of its members were forgotten before they found themselves at a reunion filled with vaguely similar facial features.

“And that’s it?” I ask the question with a bravado I don’t feel. My greatest fear is that it is it.

friendships aren’t declared. They just happen.

The store seems to brighten, the music from the speakers swells, and I wonder how I ever could’ve believed the drive here was too long to be worth making. I’ve always been willing to drive hours to get home, and that’s exactly what this place has turned out to be.

Stars twinkle up in the distance, like the sky has strung party lights just for us. And I realize there’s no point in looking toward the future. The present will do just fine.