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I spent the larger part of my high school years perpetuating that fantasy of Santa for her. She’d been the only kid in middle school who’d gotten into a fistfight defending Santa’s honor. I’d been so proud.
Campbell King is smart as fuck.
I would give my right nut to know what’s going through her mind right now. I’ve always liked lefty better anyway.
“I’m sorry, what?” Emotional whiplash is a thing. True story.
Whatever. I’m the boss. I can act sketchy if I want.
“I’m going to find me a cowboy to ride!” I can’t help but laugh. “You have a cowboy fetish I didn’t know about?” “Um… who doesn’t?”
Turns out Mike is a nervous farter. Something he proved on the flight here from New York. People in first class have no sense of humor, by the way.
is no one going to acknowledge the hairless pussy teddy bear in the room?
All this means a shit ton of people in dangerous footwear are stomping around where Mike is playfully pouncing about like a nudist on acid.

