call our “‘ought to’ self.” This is the voice that helps us follow through on commitments but can also keep us from making changes in our lives. This is the voice that might convince you that leaving a job is an abdication of responsibility. We “ought to” keep working. This impulse is helpful most of the time, but compounded over one’s life it stops us from moving towards what Gilovich and Davidai call our “ideal self.” When people reflect on their lives, these are the things that people regret most – not moving towards their ideal selves.
