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Quinn, age four, was brought into our clinic due to recurrent nightmares. Parents report that patient wakes several times a week, crying for her “husband” (“Nick”), and claiming they’ve been separated by someone. Patient insists she “isn’t supposed to be here” for hours and sometimes days afterward. There are no further signs of psychosis.
“No,” I gasp, but even as I’m denying it, praying this is a nightmare, some part of my brain has begun to recognize him too, and remembers a different life, one in which Nick does not exist. Nick does not exist. I roll face down in the grass and begin to weep.
I don’t, but I can’t entirely say why that’s the case. I just sense trouble. There’s something dark inside me, something I buried so deep I can mostly forget it’s there. But it’s been whispering to me again of late, ever since I started remembering Nick.
Except spending a morning with Quinn was like being exposed to sunlight after an entire lifetime beneath fluorescent lights. I’m not sure, now, that I can be happy with less.
I trusted my father’s views implicitly, and for good reason—I wasn’t the only one of us who sometimes knew things I should not.
He’s used to hospital rooms, but usually he’s the one barking orders, not the one sitting and praying all will be well. And in this moment, I suddenly feel certain it won’t be.
going to have to ask you to leave.” He leans over me. His concern has turned to panic. “Honey, you’re okay,” he says, but I feel it already, the dimming inside me. I want to cry out and beg the universe for one more minute, a chance to explain, but I know it’s useless.
I turn to walk away and find myself spun back toward him before I’ve even had time to process it. His mouth lands on mine without hesitation or uncertainty, as if I’m a meal he’s been waiting for years to consume.
His bride’s face is partially obscured,
“Time jumper?”
“If I were to venture a guess, I’d say there’s been some foul play. Someone has gone back in time and done something to change the course of your life.
“My wife…she was one of you.”
She grins. Her smile reminds me of someone, but I can’t place it.
Except I wasn’t apologizing for his loss. I was apologizing because I think it might have been my fault.
My God, I’ve missed this. For years, for decades.
“Please come back to me, Quinn.”
“If you don’t come find me, there will never be a time when I won’t come find you.”