More on this book
Community
Kindle Notes & Highlights
I have a philosophy: You don’t exist to serve your space; your space exists to serve you.
whether you are clean or dirty, messy or tidy, organized or unorganized—has absolutely no bearing on whether you are a good enough person.
When you view care tasks as moral, the motivation for completing them is often shame.
“It would be such a kindness to future me if I were to get up right now and do _______. That task will allow me to experience comfort, convenience, and pleasure later.”
In addiction recovery, as in most of life, success depends not on having strong willpower, but in developing mental and emotional tools to help you experience the world differently.
The Five Things Tidying Method helps the brain know exactly what it is looking for, so instead of seeing a sea of clutter and being paralyzed, it can start to see individual items.
Music, a Netflix show, a podcast, a timer, racing to see how fast you can go, a friend to help you tag team, rewarding yourself with something when you are done—all of these are tools you have to help you.
even if you don’t finish all the categories, you will be prioritizing removing the items most likely to create health hazards and attract bugs.
when marginalized communities face racism or classism, high standards for cleanliness can be a way for a family to reassert their own dignity
Begin to notice how you speak to yourself on days when you feel you have fallen behind. You can set up the best systems in the world and they won’t change your life if you still hate yourself on days when you can’t keep up.
You deserve kindness and love regardless of how good you are at care tasks.
Let me tell you what the mess in my home means. It means I’m alive. Dirty dishes mean I’ve fed myself. Scattered hobby supplies mean I am creative.
Scattered toys and mess mean I am a fun mom. The stacked boxes in the hall mean I was thoughtful enough to order what we need. The clothes strewn on the floor mean I had a full day.
