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I blow a kiss in his direction and know that I’ll always think of him like this. My moonlight boy who said he’d love me forever.
“Telling me I’m wrong isn’t the best way to make me like you again.” “I didn’t realize you had to try to. You never had to before.”
“Expectations are a funny thing. They can weigh you down or they can make you shine. What will your response be?”
“Three people. I loved you too, Asher.”
Dreams don’t have time limits.”
“Exactly that kind of stuff.” “A way to a woman’s heart is through her books. That’s for darn sure.”
“You know, if this thing with the woman you enjoy doesn’t pan out,” she says as she stops to pick up her sign and then looks over her shoulder at me, “I’m available to take her place in about twenty years. Later.”
Asher doesn’t need fixing, Ledger. She just needs someone to hold her hand if she fails, to celebrate her when she succeeds, and to listen when she speaks. There’s so much more said in silence than in a room full of people talking.”
“I don’t want to fix her, Hillary. I just want her to realize she’s not alone anymore.” “Have you told her that? That might be a good place to start.”
“I’m proud of you for sticking up for yourself today, but God, how I wish you would have let me defend you.” “I don’t need anyone to defend me, Ledger. I can take care of myself.” “I know you can. Fucking hell, I know you can, but would it hurt you to need my help every once in a while? To need me?” My voice breaks, and she finally opens her eyes and stares at me with a storm roiling in those gray irises of hers.
“And the fact that you assume it is without ever asking me should be enough in and of itself to explain my hesitation. You come first. Your work comes first . . . and frankly, I deserve better than being second to those things.”
“Don’t be like this, Ash. The plan . . .” He shakes his head in frustration. “It’s just that, a plan. Not set in stone. If anything, you’ve made me realize that life . . . it can’t be planned for. Hell, both times you’ve come into my life have been completely out of the blue. Completely unexpected . . . and I . . . fuck. I’m saying this all wrong.”
“All you need to know is I want this, I want you.”
“This should be the easiest decision in your life, Ash. Choosing me should be the easiest decision.” His voice breaks, and it nearly kills me. “But I shouldn’t have to give up my life just to have you in it.”
“I love you, Asher Wells. I think I always have.”