We cannot rid our futures of uncertainty, but we can loosen our grip on our desire for certainty. We can change our great expectations of our future self and relieve some of the pressure. When I find myself grasping my plans too tightly, I try to soften them into intentions rather than expectations. An intention is lighter—it’s an aim rather than an assumption. It’s a gentle guide, whereas an expectation is a prescriptive outcome. Expectations fixate on how a goal should look—say, to cook the perfect meal—but intentions emphasize the experience around the goal—say, to enjoy the meal with the
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