Slash

by Slash

being a rock star is the intersection of who you are and who you want to be.

I lost a piece of who I was and had to redefine myself on my own terms. I learned a lot, but those lessons didn’t help me later on when the only other family I’d known disintegrated. I saw the signs that time, when Guns N’ Roses started to come apart at the seams. But even though I did the leaving that time, the same blizzard of feelings lay in wait for me, it was every bit as hard to find my way back to my path again.

Time is such a powerful catalyst for change; you never know how kindred souls will end up—or where they might see each other again.

family. A friend still knows you as well as they used to even if you haven’t seen them in years. A true friend is there when you need him; they’re not around just on holidays and weekends.

Imitation should remain a stepping stone for a player to find his or her own voice, but it must never become his or her voice: no one should emulate their heroes to the point of note-for-note mimicry. Guitar is too personal of an expression for that; it should be exactly what it is—a singular extension of the player.

different, if I’d been born just one minute later, or been in the wrong place at the right time or vice versa, the life that I’ve lived and come to love would not exist.

word. He was proud of the fact that I’d actually made a name for myself

guy. I always see the best in people; it doesn’t matter what their fucking malfunction is.

destroyed this family’s guesthouse to a degree that surpasses nearly every similar episode that I can remember Guns ever getting into.

Work was something that I focused on and did well whether I liked my job or not, because I was willing to work my ass off all night and day for the cash to support my passion.

There are moments in life that only time can properly frame; at best you know the snapshot is special when you take it, but most of the time only distance and perspective prove you right. I had one of those moments just before I ditched education

And in my mind, that meant only one thing: If they can do it on their own terms, why the fuck can’t I?

Once you’ve lived a little you will find that whatever you send out into the world comes back to you one way or another. It may be today, tomorrow, or years from now, but it happens; usually when you least expect it, usually in a form that’s pretty different from the original. Those coincidental moments that change your life seem random at the time, but I don’t think they are. At least that’s how it’s worked out in my life. And I know I’m not the only one.

or it can coax your demise, and sometimes the choice isn’t yours. My

doing it all the time. You think it’s your choice, but it’s not

that way—soon you need to do it all the time. Then you’re hooked into a really vicious cycle before you’re even aware that you’ve become just another statistic.

had—it is actually where we took the photo on the back cover of Appetite.

life. To me, those moments onstage, playing guitar before a crowd, is what it’s all about.

So I did everything possible to put distance between yesterday and the present.

thing. It felt like if I slowed down, time would catch up and then all of it would stop. So I did everything possible to put distance between yesterday and the present. I’ve always been that way and I still am.

If we didn’t adapt we would fail; it was that simple.

I settled on one. Her name was Megan; she was nineteen.

Megan lived with her mom and younger brother in a nearby suburb and she was really exotic-looking, a heavy-chested, bubbly, sweet girl.

I began to settle into a cozy little relatio...

and hanging out with her ...

My girlfriend Megan had gone out and I was

A few days later, I had Megan move out and join me.

Chicago. I moved back into the Walnut House, with Megan. I’m not quite sure what I was thinking because I hadn’t known her long, but there she was.

friends. If Axl ever needed me for something, I’d always be there.

Megan and I had settled in; we were happy in our new home.

She turned out to be quite the homemaker, and took to keeping the place up, cooking, and being domestic very naturally. She would go to bed early and get up and go to the gym and then clean up and make dinner. After a few weeks her friend Karen came out from Chicago and they spent a week shopping.

rigs, and before I knew it, before Axl even got home, and before Megan

Megan was one of those chicks who dated the wrong guy and got dragged through the mill with me. She was pretty innocent; she might have thought she’d fallen in love, but I don’t think she had any idea of what she’d gotten into or what was going on with me once we returned to L.A. She’d met me when I was a complete drunk; and, as I’ve mentioned, to the naked eye, a clever heroin addict doesn’t act that much different, unless you count their drinks. Megan was so innocent that she didn’t pick up on the fact that I’d suddenly stopped consuming a half gallon of vodka per day, though, if anything, I was acting just as drunk—if not more so.

We continued a very sweet, very twisted, almost 1950s kind of relationship.

She would tend to t...

snakes. Before I noticed, it would be morning and Megan was up and we’d hang out and have a great time until I got tired. She never asked questions and we got along that way for a while, very happily.

had pet names for everything. Everything to her was either “cute” or “sweet,” and I was usually “sweetie.” Looking back on it, Megan sounded a lot like Jennifer Tilly.

Megan was also, as I mentioned, really domestic. She fixed the place up, especially the kitchen, and made it all entirely livable. She liked to have people over ...

meal, but Megan made us a feast: she served us some variety of chicken with several side dishes,

thing. She was really pleased,

Megan told me that she thought Mark was charming.

Megan was interesting in other ways: more often than not, rather than screw, she liked to just jerk me off and watch it…I guess we did have a pretty strange relationship.

pants, and after Megan went to sleep,

room. I often thought about waking Megan up so that she could check it out.

loft, where Megan was asleep. As I got up there, the gun went off and blasted through the ceiling opposite the loft. Megan didn’t even wake up, which is amazing.

fire, and Megan was none the wiser.

that she might have caught on to my nocturnal activities but didn’t was the morning that she woke me up on the couch in the living room. Apparently I’d nodded out with the needle right there next to me.

“Sweetie,” she said. “I think the cat is playing ...

I looked down to see one of my cats smacking my needle around ...

Not too long after that, Duff started stopping by because he w...