The Trouble with Trying to Date a Murderer (Murder Sprees and Mute Decrees #1)
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14%
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And, why would I be afraid of you? You’re competent. You’re not going to *accidentally* kill me.
22%
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“You should probably meet Annette,” he decides, offering me his hand. Like I’d ever disabuse him of the notion our hands should always be linked. I thread our fingers together and follow his lead down the street.
29%
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I don’t even know why Hollywood tries to sell fights with people hitting each other in the head. I have no desire to break my hand on some fucker’s skull, and hitting people in the neck is a great way to cause a ruckus in their body. Coughing and choking tend to keep people from being able to effectively fight back.
31%
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Once I’m decent, I scamper over to Fox’s room and enter without knocking, delighted when I barge in on Fox in his birthday suit sewing up the holes in his torso. I give him a lascivious grin, deliberately letting my eyes travel over all that deliciousness. I would have probably even made it to his feet if my gaze hadn’t gotten caught on his cock.
33%
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Wait just a gosh darn second. Fox doesn’t have balls. Me: Where did that cum come from? Future Husband: My dick? Me: YOU DON’T HAVE BALLS!!! Future Husband: I do.
36%
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She gives Fox a platter covered in gravy, announcing it’s chicken fried steak and biscuits and gravy, and then she wanders off without asking about condiments. Not that I need any, and it looks like Fox is getting his recommended eight cups of gravy a day in one meal, so he probably doesn’t need to add anything to his either.
48%
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When I get out, a steaming cup of creamy coffee sits on the counter, waiting for me, and I swear that’s the moment I fall in actual love with Arlington Fox.
58%
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My stomach thinks eating itself is a good idea, but I convince it that food is a better option by shoving some of the cold amuse-bouches into my pie hole.
66%
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“Immortality doesn’t preclude death. It makes us hard to kill, but we don’t start out that way. In fact, one of the first things a new immortal should always do is die as many ways as possible. We let Arlington grow up before we started letting him die, but I’ve known immortal parents that use the first years of life to kill their kids.”
68%
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Belaphor waits in his cab, which makes me wonder if I’ve somehow gotten a driver or a stalker. I’m pretty much ok with either since it means I have transportation waiting for me when I step out of my house.
70%
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“Grand sugar baby?” Bellamy grunts, but let’s all just notice how he doesn’t hesitate to pull his tissue paper out of the bag. Look at him being a good grand sugar baby.
77%
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“It just occurred to me that I’m going to have a red-headed step-child.” He turns to me with amusement twinkling in his dark hazel eyes. “I’m probably going to marry you just so I can say that.” I nod, completely understanding where he’s coming from. I’d do the same.
79%
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Darcy opens the cab door and bends at the waist, audibly sniffing the driver’s seat. Then he licks it. Twice. Gross. Fart mouth. You dodged the bullet with that one. I don’t send that; I just hold it up where my boys can see it. Bellamy barks out a laugh. “I wish.” What? Did he already fuck you? Bellamy purses his lips and lets out a slow breath, nodding once. It’s totally hypocritical of me to judge you, but I am. 100%
86%
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“Rethinking your three date protocol?” Fox murmurs, stretching out his hand to grab his cock, giving it a lazy pull. I may or may not have to wipe my mouth on the sheet again. Has anyone in the history of ever actually had their mouth water at the sight of a nice juicy cock, or am I trailblazing?
86%
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His hand moves from his dick to his ribs, swiping through the pool of sweat that might have started dripping down his side. “Did you drool on me?” I sit up, giving him my widest, most innocent eyes and shake my head like I have no idea what he’s talking about. He reaches for the sheet and pulls it up, miraculously finding a damp spot on it. “Did you drool on me and then use my sheet to only clean up your face?” he questions suspiciously, using the sheet to wipe the sweat away. I nod and shake my head both and end up just turning my face in a circle.