Sorrow and Starlight (Zodiac Academy, #8)

by Caroline Peckham

“We carry the souls of those we love closest in times of need,” I replied, the words feeling unlike my own, yet I supposed they were true all the same. “Thank you,” Antonia Capella said softly, her earthy brown eyes roaming over me curiously while shining with gratitude so clearly that I couldn’t deny it.

The shirt Max had given her to wear slapped him in the face as he began to protest the exposed skin she was now flaunting, and he cursed as she commanded him to cover his own ‘nippoleons’ if he was so opposed to anyone seeing any.

“Remember that time I peed on you?” he sighed nostalgically. “Who would have thought we’d end up here, Wolfman and Bitchy Flame Eyes striding into yet another adventure side by side with Fish Fury and Batty Betty bringing up the rear-” “Remember the time I punched you in the dick because of that time you peed on me?” I asked in return, and he frowned in confusion just before I swung my fist towards his crotch. Seth leapt back with a howl of surprise before breaking a laugh which made my heart hurt.

Geraldine and Max said nothing behind us, and I was starting to get the feeling that Max could already tell something was gravely wrong, even with my mental shields keeping him firmly out of my head. He just understood that now wasn’t the time to ask. A warm hand pressed to my side and I looked around at Geraldine as a flare of healing magic swept into me, stealing the pain of that wound as her power roamed free within my skin. My heart sank as she took that distraction from me, the physical pain having been a welcome reprieve from the agony raging within my soul, but I simply patted her hand in thanks and said nothing about it.

“Only this door,” he said seriously. “I am well versed in magical locks,” Geraldine interrupted their jokes. “Perhaps I can break through those and then we can think up some way to crack the physical locks too…”

“I was a thief long before I set foot in Solaria,” I said simply. “And nothing has ever stopped me from claiming my prize before.”

“Darius once told me that this door had been crafted to withstand all known powers in Solaria – even Dragon fire itself. It’s eight inches thick and completely impenetrable. But I’m willing to bet that the Fae who built it didn’t account for the possibility of Phoenixes arising in Solaria.”

“Certainly, my Queen,” Geraldine said. “It is as simple as transporting oneself – you simply toss the stardust over the object in question and tell the stars where to take it. Poof!”

Long live the true queens.

Lionel was going to fucking lose it when he realised his entire treasure trove was gone, but it felt like a wasp stinging the paw of a bear. I needed more, had to hit him harder.

Long live the motherfucking Queens.

The twins, Athena and Grayson, clutched onto each other and my younger brother Hadley gazed at them with pain sweeping through his expression.

and even though she didn’t seem to have the words to say what was haunting her, I knew. I felt it. I felt the emptiness in the world and the echoing void which would never be filled, its arms open wide as it beckoned me close, and I shook my head as I fought the urge to back away.

“Where is he?” I demanded, my voice so loud it forced everyone’s attention onto me. Tory’s green eyes swum with emotion and I looked into them deep, finding nothing but pain and darkness there. Loss and sorrow. “No,” I denied, shaking my head fiercely as I released her and took a step back like I could run from the answer I’d just demanded from her. A cry escaped Max’s lips as he felt the truth, sensed it in her emotions. He dropped to his knees with a roar of agony so potent that it burst from him and crashed into all of us, the grief of it almost knocking me from my feet. “No,” I snarled again,

It wasn’t true. There was no world that I could conceive of without him in it. The four of us were blood-bound brothers, we would remain that way until the end of our days which would not come any time soon. Seth howled again at my back and the pain in that single, unbroken note was like claws ripping through my fucking soul. “No,” I damn near shouted it before I broke into a run, shooting away from them with the speed of my gifts as I sped up the hill and into the camp.

My gaze finally fell on the face of my brother within that ice, his features still and empty, his body bloody and battle-worn, his battle axe at his side and his fisted hand so close to it that it was almost as though he would reach out and take it up once more.

But he wouldn’t. Never again. Even the strength of his powerful body couldn’t break through this wretched twist of fate. My life yawned out before me, void of this man and all he was to me. My knees buckled.

Firm hands took hold of us as the stars spun above, the murmured voices of our parents tumbling over me and cascading away again as they tugged us from our grieving and pressed healing magic into our skin. I leaned into the embrace of my mom, her arms banding around me so tightly that I knew she felt this agony too.

“Darius,” he began, wincing at the name which drove a dagger through my heart, before forcing himself to go on. “Darius would want us to keep fighting. To help the rebels regroup and-” I shot to my feet, abandoning him in the bed as I crossed the room in a blur of motion, carving a hand through my matted curls and shaking my head. “No,” I growled, turning my back on him, and refusing those words. I couldn’t just get up and go on as if nothing had changed, as if his death made no difference to any of it. “Cal.” The crack in Seth’s voice made me turn to look at him.

“He made that deal,” Seth growled, betrayal written into the tightness of his posture as he held my eye and spoke those tainted words. “He bargained with the stars and gave up his own life in the process. He chose this. He chose to do this to us, even though he knew what it would do to us. He gave up on-” I slammed into him so fast that he didn’t even have a moment to block the blow before my fist crashed into his face and sent him stumbling back.

“Take it back,” I snarled as I threw my weight into him, hurling him from his feet and landing on top of him as I swung another punch at his jaw. “No,” Seth spat, furiously. “I won’t. He made that deal with the stars and bought himself a single year with it. He didn’t even give us the chance to change his fate. He wasted that time, letting the clock run down on his life without giving the people who loved him the option of fighting it. He kept it secret just like he always kept his secrets from us.” Seth’s fist crashed into my ribs. He flipped me onto my back and straddled me, his long hair spilling down towards me as he gave me a Wolf’s snarl. “I hate him for it,” he choked out, and I lost it.

“Darius gave everything for this war! He gave everything for love and the hope of destroying the man who made his life hell for every moment that we knew him. And we just stood by and did nothing. We knew what Lionel was doing to him in that fucking manor. For years we knew, even if he couldn’t tell us outright, and we did nothing.”

“He should have fought that fate,” he growled. “He should have told us, should have let us help him. But instead, he embraced it. He let Tory love him, let us believe in a future he knew we would never get to claim and walked towards his death like a willing sacrifice while damning the consequences. He’s gone now. Passed through the Veil to the peace that awaits there and where are we? Left broken in the ruins left by his end, left grieving and bleeding from a wound which will never heal.” “He didn’t expect to die on that battlefield,” I said, my voice cracking. “He didn’t expect to leave us yet. He thought he still had more time. He thought-” “What difference does it make?” Seth asked, his eyes flashing silver as his Wolf paced beneath his skin. “Christmas is weeks away.

“Fuck you, Cal,” he choked out around the tightness of my hold. I bared my teeth at him, wanting his pain, his anger, anything at all other than facing the abyss of Darius’s loss which waited with open jaws, hungering for me with every passing second. “Fuck you, Seth,” I snarled right back.

My mouth was on his before I could think of anything else, my tongue breaching the barrier of his lips as I shoved him back against the wall, endless nights of fantasising about the taste of him, the feel of him all rushing into me and making me act without thought or reason. I knew how this ended. Knew it didn’t mean the same thing to him as it did to me, but right now, I didn’t care.

I let him shove it from my left arm, leaving it hanging from my right where I refused to relinquish my hold on his throat. Mine. In here, right now, he was mine, and I didn’t care what that meant for after. I didn’t care that this wasn’t the same for him as it was for me because he was submitting to it, giving me what I craved and letting me fall for this pretty lie while I worked to bury myself in it.

“Yeah,” he spat bitterly. “That’s what I do. I just want to make sure we’re clear on that before you go making any dumb decisions like falling in love with me.” Something burrowed into my chest at those words, sharp claws tearing through whatever part of me was left whole in the wake of losing Darius, but I forced the feeling aside. I didn’t need more pain. I needed something else.

“Use me then, Cal,” Seth panted in submission, the want in him peeling me open and making me come undone for him. “Take me and use me and make me forget all the shit in this world for a little while. I’ll be a good pup for you if that’s what you need. Just promise you’ll be rough with me while I’m yours. My heart can’t take tender right now.”

“On your knees,” I demanded, tugging on his hair hard enough to make him hiss, but a groan followed the noise, making it more than clear that he liked it. “I’ve been dreaming about that mouth of yours and I need to feel it again.” Seth sucked in a sharp breath at those words but instead of giving in to my demand, he yanked against my hold on his hair and took my mouth with his instead.

“Tell me how much you want me,” I commanded, my heart hammering to a rampant tune as I pumped my cock so close to that mouth. Seth hesitated for a moment, his eyes moving from my dick to meet my gaze and my heart leapt as we looked at one another like that. “Too much,” he breathed. “I want you too fucking bad and I can’t help it. Can’t stop it. I’m yours to do whatever you want with. I’m your fucking Wolf, Cal, and the thought of making you mine is too much to bear.”

I had to wonder what the fuck I’d been thinking when I’d agreed to something so empty with the one person I cared for more than anyone else in this damn world.

“We were discussing the best course of action from here,” Tiberius answered my unvoiced question. “Plans for our movements and where best to strike back-” “And it has been pointed out more than once that there is no need for any command from a pack of gandergeese here,” Geraldine cut him off. “The rebellion has and always will be members of the Almighty Sovereign Society, followers of the true queens and servants to the crown-” “A crown which now sits upon the brow of a usurper,” Antonia growled. “It matters not where a trinket rests, whether it be upon the scaley slapper chaps of that most loathsome of cretins or down a dump shoot, covered in Griffin poop.

“Solaria does not recognise the leadership of Roxanya or Gwendalina Vega,” Tiberius replied easily. “And neither do we. The three of us are honour bound and blood sworn to serve, protect and lead our people, so that is what we intend to do.” They kept up that back and forth, Geraldine throwing all kinds of weird and wild names at the Councillors while they adamantly insisted on maintaining rule among the rebels regardless of their loyalties to the Vegas.

All the while they argued, Tory said nothing, even Xavier offered a word here and there, implying that he stood with his sister-in-law on this, despite the fact it was clear that my mom and the others were looking to him to take up the fourth place in their ring of power now that Lionel had betrayed them, and Darius was no longer able to take it himself.

Runes held symbolic meaning which could change in divination depending on a number of factors, but from the combination she had etched into the wood, I guessed at the intention behind them and stilled.

Gebo for sacrifice, Naudhiz for resistance, Perthro for fate, Uruz for power, and Eihwaz for rebirth. Were they meant as predictions or promises? Tory’s eyes snapped up to meet mine and something glimmered there, defiance in the darkness which made a creeping sense of foreboding crawl up my spine.

“I’m only bringing it up because I know the tales of the covens of old, and I know that if Orion were dead, I would have felt the ripping of that bond from my soul. I have felt no such thing, meaning-” “His shameless brutishness lives!” Geraldine gasped,

betrayed the trust of the people in all Vampires – especially considering who you are and the power of your position. I don’t think you understand the seriousness of-” “My sister and I pardoned them of all implied or real punishments that might have been expected for their bond,” Tory interrupted, though they definitely hadn’t done that, and I wouldn’t have recognised their power to do so anyway. “If you have an issue with it, then perhaps you should take that up with me.”

“We need to prepare the rebels to move,” Tory said after a beat of silence let the tension in the air simmer down. “We can debate the location later. Geraldine can fill you in on everything else you need to know until then.” The girl who could be queen stood, turning from the room despite the protests of my mom and the other Councillors, not even giving a shit as she turned her back on them and offered up that insult before striding from the room.

“I don’t accept this fate,” she said simply. “I refuse it, and I refuse the guidance of the stars over my life.” “What does that mean?” I asked, my brows drawing together as I looked down at her hand between us and the heat of a furnace burning within her skin warmed me. “I cursed them,” she replied simply, like there was anything simple about that idea. “Each and every one of them. I cursed them and I swore to rip my fate from their clutches no matter the cost to me or my soul. I’ll see them burn, Caleb. And I’ll find him again in this life or the next before I’m done.”

“Then I offer myself to you,” I swore in a low and steady voice, whispering my next words because they felt so important. “In any way that I can be of service to you in fulfilling that vow, I offer it. Through blood, duty, honour, or sacrifice, I am yours to command in pursuit of this end.” Tory released a shuddering breath and a single tear fell from her eye, rolling down her cheek before splashing against the back of her burning hot hand where it lay over my heart. “There isn’t a depth I won’t fall to for this,” she warned me, and I nodded. “Then I’m ready to fall at your side.”

Yessss

I was having no luck breaking Gabriel Nox’s mind, and he was impervious to Dark Coercion for reasons that I was sure had to do with those fucking Vegas. So I needed a Cyclops powerful enough to break into his head and pull out the visions he was keeping there. Vard was capable of it, but I would make him suffer before I healed his deplorable form and dragged him back to the palace.

Hail and Merissa coddling the infant boy they’d claimed as their ward. It had always seemed strange to me, but when Vard had seen the truth of who he was, my suspicions were finally justified. It had all become so obvious. Merissa’s bastard-born son - a true blooded son and not some waif they’d taken pity on at all. I had thought him dead after my Nymphs had come to kill them all those years ago, but it seemed the Seer queen had made certain that all of her children escaped my wrath that night. That explained everything. Why his Sight was so great. Where his unwavering allegiance to those Vega brats had come from, and why he had been so certain of his devotion to them. But now he belonged to me.

“I am too much for you.” “I’m the only one who could ever handle you,” she insisted as her will broke, her dark eyes flaring with desire. “But I deserved better. I waited for you year after year, I married a man I didn’t love because you commanded it, I have offered you counsel in dark magic, I have been there for you through everything, and now you offer me nothing.”

“Lavinia kills any woman I go near,” I said, a growl rumbling in my chest as I admitted that fucking vulnerability. I lowered my voice to a whisper as I went on, “She is no queen of mine. I will rid myself of her when the time is right.”

Father had seen me then. He had been forced to acknowledge my superiority once I was finally given the opportunity to prove myself. I did not blame him for his initial preference, in fact, I had seen merit in it myself when I had sired my own sons. Darius had always shown more prowess than Xavier, and so he was where my resources had been placed. It was pragmatic and did away with foolish concepts like coddling your spawn.

Her blood red lips pulled into a wide smile as she met my gaze, daring me to say a word to defend my kind. She sneered just slightly as her attention slipped to my nose ring, the symbol of my position as a full bull, able to create a herd of my own.

I held Highspell’s stare. I wasn’t a fool. I wasn’t going to waste my breath on defiant outbursts which would only land me in detention, or worse. This game we were playing wasn’t worth risking for petty pride, so I dropped my eyes to the desk before me in what Highspell would assume was submission, or shame over my Order, or whatever the fuck else she cared to believe, and I bit down on my tongue so hard that it bled.

“Lionel killed Darius during the battle,” Gary breathed, and it was like the entire world fell still around me as I took in those words, trying to make sense of them. “You can’t be serious?” Bernice gasped as Gary hung his head like he couldn’t bear watching the truth of that declaration sink into us.

“Who else might even stand a chance against him now? Who the hell is going to be able to stop that Orderist piece of shit from destroying our entire kingdom now that Darius is…” “The Vegas are more powerful than Lionel Acrux,” I said firmly, raising my voice as I looked around the gathered group. The Undercover A.S.S.