Him (Him, #1)

by Sarina Bowen

Because it’s Wes. He’s not scary. And the things we do in bed are just plain hot.

What’s good about going gay?” I nudge him back under the table. “Well, dicks,” he says. “Obvs.” “Obvs.”

I’m standing in a lake with the most beautiful man wrapped around my body, and his dick is hard against my belly already. This must be what heaven is like.

“You are goddamn addictive, Wes.”

Swimming with a hard-on is extremely difficult.

I wasn’t exaggerating before. I’m addicted to Ryan Wesley. And right now I desperately need a fix.

God, and that’s something I never imagined I’d be doing. Riding another man’s cock.

I could get used to this. I really could.

I want to ask him what I am, then. An extended hook-up? A summer fling? I knew this thing with us was bound to end eventually, but I at least thought the time we’ve had together has meant something to him. Because it means something to me.

I’m not sure what, or why, but I do know that this isn’t just about sex for me.

Besides, science has proven that slushies are conducive to the making of important life decisions.” “Dude, you really need to quit quoting ‘science’ all the time.”

I’m…bisexual.

Wes’s face is still buried in my neck. I like it there. I wish he’d never leave.

Fuck. I love him so much.

Right then, with those brown eyes looking up, full of lust for me, he’s the sexiest thing I’ve ever seen.

I came to Lake Placid hoping we could still be friends. I got much more than that. And I’m so grateful.

He licks his lips. “If you come, you’ll take me with you.”

Indeed. I wrap my arms around him and hold on for as long as I dare. I honestly don’t know how I’m ever going to give him up when summer comes to an end.

My boyfriend? I thought I’d resigned myself to the fact that we weren’t going to be together. And now I’m thinking of him as my boyfriend?

The odds of me ever loving anyone else like I love him are about as good as being attacked by a shark.

Jamie Canning was my first crush and my first love. But he was never mine to have.

I can’t escape Jamie Canning, no matter how hard I try.

The idea of being with anyone other than Jamie absolutely kills me.

Either way, my heart won’t be in it. My heart is back in Lake Placid. Or maybe it’s in California. It goes wherever Jamie Canning goes.

He’s right about that. Summer always ends.

I need to speak to him—I’ve already decided that. But then I’ll have to find a way to put him out of my mind. I don’t want to always be looking for his face when I walk down the street. Moving on is going to be hard.

I’ve never had any willpower where Jamie Canning is concerned.

I fucking love you, and I know that’s inconvenient. But I didn’t get a chance to tell you in Lake Placid, so I’m telling you right now. Just in case we can ever get more than a summer. I love you, and I wish things were different.”

“Sorry,” I choke out. “We’re going to have to work something out. I love you, goddamn it.” His breath hitches. “Yeah?” “Fuck yeah. And I’m not letting you walk out of here.” “Ever?” he teases, squeezing my hand. “That’s one way to prevent gossip.”

“You’re worth it,” I whisper. Fuck, I’m worth it. My change of heart isn’t pure generosity. If Jamie is brave enough to walk in here and tell me he loves me, I’ve got to take some chances, too.

“I’m dead serious. It’s my life, and yours. I’ve loved you for years, babe. If the NHL can’t deal with it, then that’s just the way it is.” Jamie’s expression softens. “That will be a really bad day, though.” “No. A bad day is you giving up on me.”

“You really do love me, huh?” “Always have.” I swallow hard. “Always will.”

He passes me his shirt and I put it on. It smells like him. I’m going to be horny all evening. The best kind of torture.

“You look hot in my suit.” “You look hot in anything.” He reaches down and squeezes my dick through the wool trousers. “You get a blowjob later, just for saying that.”

When I step out onto the sidewalk a few minutes later, I’m a little dazed and walking carefully in shoes that are slightly too big. And I’ve never felt better in my life.

I love Jamie. I’ve always loved Jamie. And now that I know he feels the same way, I can’t wait to see him again. To live with him again.

Tonight’s agenda: getting rid of the death chair and going grocery shopping. Look at me being all domestic. I’m kinda digging it.

“Dude, my couch is wearing a condom.”

Shit, he’s desperate for it. I guess I would be too if I’d walked around all day with a plug rubbing on my prostate.

“I like you like this,” I murmur. “That sexy ass in the air. Having you at my mercy. Hearing you beg.” He blows out a breath. “You’re a sadist.”

We’re joined in every way possible. My cock inside him, our tongues fused together, his powerful body straining against mine.

“We need towels, and a plug for you. So you can walk a mile in my horny shoes.”

“I spent my whole life trying to stand out from the crowd. I swear to God, I could announce I wanted to live my life as a reclusive vampire yeti, and they’d still say ‘Oh, Jamie. You’re so cute.’”

“But here’s the thing about family, Ryan…blood doesn’t mean shit. You just need to surround yourself with people who do love you, and they become your family.”

“I’m your family, babe.”

“Loved you every summer since I was thirteen years old. Love you even more now.”

I lock my hands at the nape of his neck and tug him closer. Warm skin slides against mine, and I know I’m home. Because home is with him.

I look up and find him in the mob, and it’s like the sun just came out. It’s only been an hour since I saw him last, but he has the same damn effect on me every time.

Jamie and I lock eyes then, and there’s humor in his. Maybe he’s thinking the same thing I am—if his mom visits, we’ll have to hide all the sex toys in the bathroom cabinet.

Dear Ryan. Thank you for making Jamie so happy. He loves you and so do we. Welcome to the Canning clan.