Don't Let Me Fall (Don't Let Me, #1)

by Kelsie Rae

This message is for the cute girl in the beater who was staring at me at the light. Hope this is you. You should text me. 547-555-4119

Theodore Taylor runs off booze, tits, and hockey like a toddler does with sippy cups, Disney+, and naptime.

“Because joking with my friend’s girlfriend is one thing but screwing her in the kitchen is probably against the roommate agreement, don’t you think?”

Why didn’t he notice you were wearing my shirt before you left his room?”

“Want to know a secret, Sunshine?” His tongue darts out between his lips, and his gaze drops to my mouth, then flicks back to my eyes. “I would’ve noticed.”

She smiles, pressing the edge of her pen against her bottom lip as she eyes me curiously. “And how will you do it?” My attention drops to her mouth. “Depends on my mood.” “And right now?” she whispers, nibbling on the back of her pen. “What’s your mood telling you?” Fuck.

But when you’re the villain in your own story, it’s hard to stop yourself from fighting for the opposite in someone else’s. Even if it’s only for a minute.

“Then, you’re not allowed to be jealous,” he growls. “I’m not jealous.” “Could’ve fooled me.”

“Tell me, Sunshine.” He pauses, and I hold my breath. “Did he notice?”

“The sheets are tempting,” I rasp. “But I think I still prefer you in my T-shirt.”

But my pride over finally beating Colt at his own game only lasts for about two seconds. It fades away, replaced with longing and regret. Because what just happened between us? It feels a lot more final than what I’d been hoping. But isn’t it what I want? To finally end this stupid charade? I don’t know anymore. And my victory? It doesn’t taste sweet. Actually, it tastes like shit. I hate it.

“I’m not lying, Sunshine.” “Why do you call me that?” His expression softens into a ghost of a smile. One barely there, yet somehow reaching his eyes. “You’re a ray of sunshine, Ash. You’re the only thing I’ve been looking forward to since I moved back. Maybe even before then,” he admits, his eyes going hazy. “Since my dad died.”

“In the hall that night. I imagined you. What it would feel like to have you inside of me. To have your lips against mine. Your––” She gasps as I push myself into her, her breathing staggered but laced with need. Resting her head against her forearm on the wall, she catches her breath. “You have no idea how good this feels.” “Trust me,” I grunt, forcing myself to stay calm as she adjusts to me being inside her. “I know how good it feels. What else did you imagine?” “This,” she whispers, rolling her hips against mine, silently urging me to continue. “I imagined this. What it would feel like to stretch around you. To hear your groans. To feel you. All of you. The way you’d whisper my name.”

Her soft breath fans across my cheeks as she leans closer and presses her forehead to mine, breathing me in as her pulse flutters in her neck. It’s intimate. Something I haven’t really felt since high school. But I like it. I like her.

I’m jealous Colt could have any girl he wants, yet I’m too scared about letting him in to claim him as my own. I’m jealous that I’ve been in this position before. That I’ve wanted to run away so many times, and he’s always reached out to keep me from running. To keep me from hiding from my true feelings, which are more real than I’d like to admit. To anyone, let alone myself.

“I think I might even see you in white one day, walking down an aisle toward me.”

Don’t belittle your own feelings because you’re afraid it’ll inconvenience someone else.”

“There’s nothing wrong with putting someone else first,” I argue. “True. But there is something wrong when you’re always the one taking the brunt of it. And since you suck at looking out for yourself, I’m gonna do it for you.”