Irresponsible Puckboy (Puckboys, #2)

by Eden Finley

He kisses me like I’m breakable. It’s slow, sweet, consuming. I hate it. It’s the worst thing he’s ever unknowingly done. Because as we stand at an altar, promising ourselves to each other and sealing it with a kiss, my heart has never experienced such pain. As soon as our mouths break apart, this will be over, and I will be crushed. I try to burn the final seconds into my mind, and then with what little self-control I have left, I step back, keeping my head low so he can’t see my glassy eyes. “Are you … crying?” Dex asks. Well, fuck. I wipe at my face. “I always cry at weddings.”

I act like it’s no big deal and take my bag before heading down to the next room, wondering if this is one of those things that should have been obvious. It hadn’t occurred to me that we’d have separate rooms.

I don’t know how to be without Dex.

“I like you, Dex, but Jesus Christ you would have to be the world’s biggest dumbass. What is wrong with you? How could you make him do that?” Does Oskar sound … hurt? I can’t even answer him. My annoyance from earlier dries up because yeah, I’ve been called dumb a lot in my life, but never like that. “I … I …”

I’m bored without Dex. And lonely. And this is why I’ve never told him about my feelings. Because it will drive him away. I have plenty of friends I can hang out with, but it’s different with him. No matter how many people are around, without him, that loneliness is constant.

my heart led me to Tripp. I think he’s owned it from the beginning, but I was too dumb to see it. Maybe no one’s told you this, but I’m not exactly known for my smarts.” Everyone in the room snickers except me because I know it hurts him when he feels the need to be self-deprecating like that.

I step forward and press my mouth to his. I ignore the pang of heartache, the longing I’ve carried around for years, and try to show him I’m still the same Tripp. I’m his best friend. He’s my heart and soul. And nothing will ever change that. Not even his inability to love me back.

I’m scared that these feelings for Tripp might go away, and I really, really don’t want them to.

But by this point, I hurt when I’m with him. I hurt when I’m without him. There’s nothing else I can possibly do.

Like it’s a secret agreement between my ass and my balls. When one of us is having fun, we’re all having fun.

It’s that sentence that does it. That doesn’t mean you’re not valid.

with those six words, something has relaxed inside me. Like maybe I can do this. Because maybe I’m not faking it at all.

I can love Tripp the way my body always has because my brain has finally caught up.

Time to switch my brain off when it comes to playing. It should be easy. I’ve had plenty of practice not using my head.

“I’m dumb a lot of the time, but the best dumb decision I ever made was marrying you. Because now I know why I could spend forever with you, and only you. I know we’re supposed to stand up here and announce some bogus divorce, but I don’t want that. I want us.” My voice breaks. “Always. Forever. Because I am so fucking in love with you, I don’t know myself without you.”