Holigay

by K.M. Neuhold

Most people look at Matt and see a big, tough guy with tattoos and a killer beard. What they don’t see is that he’s the biggest marshmallow of a man I’ve ever met, and I love that about him.

I know, I know, total cliché, gay dude in love with his straight best friend. But it’s a cliché for a reason, I suppose.

That’s what I need in the woman I ultimately marry. I need her to feel like home the way Caspian does.

“You’d better not tell me we’re sleeping in tents on the beach or something crazy. You know I need a plush bed and a giant soaking tub or it isn’t a vacation at all.”

one giant king-size bed.

I just walked in on my best friend jerking off—possibly fantasizing about me, but that’s a whole other thing to unpack—and it turned me on.

I’ve looked at him a million times, in a million different ways, but it feels like this is the first time I’m seeing him.

“You’re hot,” he explains with a one shoulder shrug. “I know you’re straight. I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I would never do anything, I just...I think about it sometimes...fantasize.” My dick likes that. A lot.

“It didn’t make me uncomfortable,” I say, barely louder than a whisper. “It made me horny as fuck.”

I grab him by the back of the neck and slam my lips into his.

As we walk, Matt slips his hand into mine and I stumble over my feet.

Whatever is happening right now, he’s still my best friend, and he pinky promised that wouldn’t change. Pinky promises are sacred.

How the hell did I go so long without knowing how amazing it is to kiss my best friend?

“HoliGay,” he repeats. “He’s curious and giving himself permission to experiment because nothing on vacation counts anyway. It’s a vaGaytion.”

I’m in love with him. I’ve always been in love with him, I just didn’t know it until now.

I’ve been picturing it this way all week, with you on top of me, filling me, taking care of me like you always do.” Heat rises in my cheeks as I realize how needy that sounds, even if it’s the truth.

He wraps his arms around me, and even though he’s much smaller than I am, it fills me with a sense of safety and peace. Caspian has me, and nothing can come between us. This is what love is.

who knew you were such a cock slut?” he teases.

“Honestly, I don’t really know what I am. Bi, I guess, if I have to put a label on it. But I know I’m into you. Actually, more like, ridiculously, crazy, over the moon fucking in love with you. Is that enough?”