Shattered Sea (Tattered & Torn, #4)

by Catherine Cowles

“You know what I think about the word fine. It really stands for fucked up, insecure, neurotic, and emotional.”

When you lost someone you loved, it made it hard to let go of anyone else—even if they didn’t have your best interests at heart.

drowned in what-ifs. We all did in one way or another.

“Loss has a way of carving itself into your bones. It shouldn’t be any other way.”

It dropped to the floor, smashing into a million tiny pieces—shards so small there was no way to put them back together. Not in a way that would make a working glass again. Sometimes, like now, I felt just like that glass. Shattered beyond recognition.

life was rarely what it should be. You simply had to do your best to make something beautiful out of the shattered pieces.

“I know that. And I’d never want to tell someone what to feel. But I can’t be the receptacle for his pain. It’s not fair to me, and it hurts too damn much.”

Help was a tricky thing, though. If you started to count on it, that help could make you weak when it was no longer there.

“If there are whoopie pies in there, I’ll marry you. It’ll be a loveless, sexless marriage, you understand. But I’ll marry you.” I barked out a laugh. “Looks like we’re getting hitched.”

God, I admired that stubborn streak. That strength. But I wanted nothing more than for her to let me in a little. Maybe even let me help.

Something about that made me sad. The fact that Boden and I didn’t belong in the same universe. It was just some weird hiccup in the space-time continuum that had brought us together, and it wouldn’t last.

“When we love someone, it’s easy to want to fix everything for them.”

“Doing the things that cause us pain sometimes brings the greatest reward in the end. You know you were strong enough to make it through, and the view from where you’ve gotten to is always that much sweeter.”

“I have myself.” “The most important bond we’ll ever have. But it’s not the only one we need.

The world wasn’t black and white. It was shades of gray that twirled and twisted. Sometimes, the truth hid beneath all those knots. And sometimes, it was impossible to see it at all.

“We all bring baggage into relationships. But it’s nice to have someone help us carry it for a while.”

“It’s not weakness to feel and to do it deeply. It’s weak if you turn away from someone you care about when they need you. It’s weak if you turn away because you’re scared they’ll see that depth of feeling.”

And in that moment, I knew this was how it could always be. A give and take. A sort of messy perfection that was the most incredible thing I’d ever experienced. And I’d do anything to protect it.

we found a rhythm that was the dance of flame between us. Hungry and tender at the same time. Painting an image that I knew spoke of love and the deepest understanding.

“How about I promise you today? And I’ll do it again tomorrow. And every day until we’re old and gray.”

“Grief changes us.

I’m loving him by letting the consequences of his actions take hold. All I can hope for is that it wakes him up.”