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Alex Winslow was beautiful in a way storms were—only from afar. Just like them, he had the power to sweep and ruin you, two things I was too busy surviving to entertain.
“When I finally lay my hands on you—and make no mistakes, Stardust, I will—you will be crying, all right. My name. Over. And. Over. Again.”
“If you want me to believe you about not wanting me to fuck you raw, you should probably stop looking at me like that. Like you’re already mine,”
You look at me with dynamite in your eyes, waiting for me to light up the match and finally set you on fire.”
“When I look at you, I see something broken that isn’t worth fixing. And you look at me like I’m a cheap thing to replace the expensive one that’s been stolen from you. See, we’re all vases. And you’re the one scattered on the floor, shattered beyond repair. So I’ll let someone else pick you up. It’s really that simple. Have fun with your temporary glue.”
“Anything essential is invisible to the eye.” My eyes shot up. I’d recognize those words anywhere. “The Little Prince.”
Life is full of secrets, and narrow-minded people, and sugar-coated, empty conversations that hold no weight. What’s real is what’s inside us. What’s important is what we feel.
“I apologize in advance.” He cocked his head to the side. “For?” “Ruining you for any other man on this planet. I’m going to fuck you, Indie. So hard you’ll think about me years from now, when you lie under your boring, missionary-loving husband. I will own every orgasm, every shiver, every wave of pleasure inside you. From here on out, it will be me. Just me. And for that, I truly am sorry.”
“God, you’re beautiful.” And oh, was she ever. Like a painfully short, brilliant song that keeps you thirsty for more.
I stood up and left her on the floor, thinking, for the first time in years—this is better than alcohol. Better than the champagne I smuggled.
“Why are you here?” Because I can’t bear the thought of Lucas standing in my spot.
“What do you want from me, Alex?” Everything. I want everything, and then all the things you’ve already given away to other people. I want them back, too.
Alex thought about dying, and I thought about how I’d do anything to keep him alive, even if it killed me.
“Why, I’m wearing the most beautiful thing one could wear, darlin’. My smile.”
“This is perfect,” I exclaimed. “This is everything.” “You’re everything,” I heard him say, still standing at the door.
It was you I wrote songs about. It is you I see first thing in the morning before I open my eyes, like you’re carved into my fucking eyelids from the inside.
Yours (even if you think you don’t need me), A.
