“Don’t Tilda me. You knew I would ask you about it. Come on, spill! What is he packing? Is he well hung? Does it have a weird shape? Ridges? Feelers? Oh, my God! Does he have two peens? I read about some alien species that has two peens. And then there’s this other one that opens up like a flower.” She suddenly paled and eyed me with horror. “Fuck … he’s like a duck, isn’t he? He’s got that crazy spiraling peen that shoots out like a spring, doesn’t he?”
