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August 24 - August 26, 2022
The only one of us who has a child back home, Hannah’s had the hardest time accepting that she’s not going to wake up in her bed again, no matter how many times she pinches herself.
He loved nothing more than pitting his sons against each other, and he will delight, even as he meets the goddess and his body is returned to starlight, in seeing us at each other’s throats.
I am not my father. I do not want to fuck away my feelings. I want to fight.
Her skin is the pale shade of shame,
Today, I’ll show her my skill. Today, I’ll kill for her. Today, I’ll make her mine.
It’s mostly some other species, vaguely humanoid, with textured skin that seems to blend into the surroundings and wide, expressive eyes.
Suddenly I’m hot, not like the arid heat that has sapped my energy since we landed on this planet, but like my blood is literally boiling me from the inside, melting me. I want to strip off what’s left of my flannel pajamas. Heat pools between my thighs, and I press my knees together, embarrassed.
Usually, I have to get to know someone before I feel even a hint of attraction. Mind first, heart second, body third. Or tenth.
I’ve lost some weight since I was abducted, but I’m still what one of my foster mothers used to call “sturdy.”
When she is introduced as Irra’s fated queen, her attentions will be divided. There will be many obligations and events, and I know her love for our people will rival her love for me. But until then...she is mine alone.
Oooh, I dunno about that one homeslice. Think you might be counting your eggs before they hatch there, bud.
He’s ruthless but kind. He’s a seven-foot-tall, chiseled warrior who can hold me captive with one hand, but he kneeled to a child’s sword. He stole me, but instead of locking me up like the Frathiks did, he brought me to a beautiful garden.
“Who are you?” I ask. He repeats my words back to me in a strange, slurring accent. I pat my chest. “Ada,” I say. Then I point to him, hoping he’ll figure out my meaning. “Ada,” he repeats, placing his hand on his chest, his expression near reverent. I burst out a semi-hysterical laugh, the
Her tongue fumbles, trying to string together the syllables. Maybe it’s the sight of her blunt little milk teeth, but it sounds like she is a babbling infant. My amusement must show my face because she drops my hand, glaring at me. “Ray-peetit.” My little queen knows how to give an order.
A king never begs. My father’s voice echoes in my head, but I push him away. He never held his fated queen. Perhaps if he’d had his Alara in his arms, he’d feel differently about begging.
I knew this nice-alien act was too good to be true. Lothan probably dragged me off and fixed me up so he could eat me or rape me or something worse that I can’t even imagine because it’s some weird alien shit.
“Not this time. I won’t take you until we can understand each other perfectly, Alara.”
Did this alien just claim that I’m a queen? That’s the most ridiculous thing I’ve ever heard. I might wear a crown every day on Earth, but it’s plastic. I make minimum wage plus tips to squeeze into a polyester party dress and light birthday candles and wipe the noses of four-year-olds, that’s all. Chosen by the goddess, my ass.
“I don’t even believe in an Earth god, let alone some alien star goddess. And I’m sure as shit not taking your word for it.”
Turn down the dial, space slut.
He runs that damn tongue over his teeth, which is not helping. “I disagree. It is what you are made for.” I gape at him, my arm dropping limply to my side as all desire vanishes. “I’m made to fuck? Gee, thanks.”
Guess what, there’s no moral order in space. 9-1-1 operators don’t answer your calls. There’s only right and wrong in the moment, no promise of justice later.
“If we get back.” Hannah worries her lip with her teeth. “I just hope he believes me about what happened. I hardly even believe it myself, and it happened to me. He’ll probably just think I relapsed and abandoned them. Even I thought I was on drugs for the first few weeks we were on the ship,” she muses, pain creasing her face.
I wouldn’t mind following his rules, I think. No, that’s my clit talking, not my head.
“Please,” I beg her, though kings do not beg. In this moment, I’m no king. “Lie to me, Alara. Lie to me so I can prove it to you.”
It should be easy to do what he wants. Just say the words, pretend to go along with it. It’s not like I haven’t lied before, given false compliments, faked orgasms with guys who didn’t care about my pleasure one way or another and just wanted to check the box to make themselves feel good. And this should be easier, just a line in a script.
“If I claim you, I will never let you go. And I cannot bind you to me unless you feel the truth in your heart.”
Alioth incarnate, divine embodied. Because this is beyond simple sensation, body inside body. This is like fucking the center of the star. I am consumed, ablaze.
I peel away from him. Why does he always bring this back to his religious crap? I just...like him. Because of who he is, not because of magical starlight bullshit. I like him because he’s intelligent and funny and thoughtful and sexy and...very sexy, according to the fresh ache between my legs that is encouraging me to climb into his lap right here in the bath.
Ada’s satisfied, guilty tone makes her sound like a greenling who ate the whole bowl of sweetgrass jelly. She admits everything and regrets nothing.
I was running away from something, too. Away from Biinji and the painful reminders of my childhood he brings with him. Away from my own selfish happiness. Away from Lothan’s seductive fairytales.
There is still hope, that tiny golden voice says. As long as you have time together, there’s hope. Dumb brain. How did I spend my whole life planning for worst-case scenarios, and then when I’m in a worst-case scenario, I get this silver-lining, Pollyanna bullshit?
We sleep and wake, Jara and Alara, fated to live and die together.
My throat constricts, and I close the window, strangely disappointed even though I’ve never once in my life expected to hear a divine voice reply to my bedtime prayer. Why would I now? Goddesses have more important things to worry about than my measly whispers.
When those gray motherfuckers come through the door, they are in for a sharp surprise. Watch out for your elephant dicks, boys.
Any alien that can pull off a man-bun hairdo must be civilized, I decide, and I feel myself start to relax.
suddenly conscious that I’m completely naked under the black cloth. I guess these guys are, too, which makes it even weirder, like we’re all wearing towels in the gym locker room or something.
“My queen. My love,” I murmur, letting my kisses fall like rain, like she is the ground that thirsts for me, and I am unable to resist her gravity. I’ve never been so grateful to forfeit and taste the earth. “My Alara.” My home.
Welcome home, a lilting golden voice inside my head sings. And there’s no doubt about it this time. I feel the goddess in my bones. My home, my purpose, settles into me, becomes part of me like the crown became part of my skin.
“More,” he commands me, dropping back down to a fighting stance, but I shake my head, chuckling. “You are as greedy as your mother,” I chide him. “She always gets what she wants, so why shouldn’t I?” He’s unable to hide his mischievous grin.