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Kindle Notes & Highlights
It reminds us that our mood is not fixed and it does not define who we are; it is a sensation we experience.
How you feel is not simply a product of your brain.
Mood fluctuation is normal. Nobody is happy all the time. But we don’t have to be at the mercy of it either. There are things we can do that help.
Low mood gives us the urge to do things that can make our mood even worse.
Relate!
The power of any thought is in how much we buy into it. How much we believe it to be true and meaningful.
A good decision is one that moves you in the direction you want to go. It doesn’t have to catapult you there.
If you do one thing today, make it exercise. Choose something you enjoy and you increase your chances of keeping it going.
Mastering motivation is building the capacity to do what matters most to you, even when a part of you does not feel like it.
We cannot rely on motivation to be there all the time.
We have more influence over our emotional state than we were ever taught to believe.
You are not your feelings and your feelings are not who you are.
The language we use has a powerful effect on our experience of the world.
Most people don’t want to be told what to do. But they do want someone to keep showing up to check in and show they care.
Simply spending time together, even in silence, is OK. By being there, you are helping them to feel less alone and more cared for.
Listen carefully. Don’t offer advice unless they ask for it. Just reflect back what you hear them saying; let them know they are being heard and respected.
we need to understand that our worthiness as a human being is not dependent on living mistake-free.
being imperfect, making mistakes or failing is all a part of being human.
The one person you most need the approval of is you.
If we only do the things we know we can do well, fear of the new and unknown tends to grow. Building confidence inevitably demands that we make friends with vulnerability because it is the only way to be without confidence for a while.
When we can step into fear and sit with the unknown, it is the courage of doing so that builds confidence from the ground up.
on the days when we don’t feel strong, we don’t need to tell ourselves that we are. We can acknowledge that feeling this way sometimes is a part of being human.
To build confidence, go where you have none. Repeat every day and watch your confidence develop. Confidence is situation-specific, but what you keep as you move around is the belief that you can tolerate the fear as confidence grows.
When the pain of failure is still present it can be difficult to even consider trying again. Instead we want to run and hide. Coming back to your values and the reason you are doing this thing will help you make a decision based on your best interests and the life you want to have, rather than basing that decision purely on the pain.
Most self-doubt is linked to the relationship we have with failure. How other people respond to your failure does not say anything about your own personality or worthiness.
The best kind of coach is not one who swoops in to rescue you, but one who is honest with you and encourages you to find the strength within yourself to move through difficult moments, so that you may discover your own strength.
The test becomes less threatening because it is no longer about proving our self-worth. Our self-worth becomes inherent in our efforts to make a difference.
Values are a set of ideas about how you want to live your life, the kind of person you want to be and the principles you want to stand for.
all the good in life is not waiting at the end point of goals, but in the process we go through along the way.
You still get to strive towards change and achievement with all your strength, but you are not waiting for a meaningful life, you already have it.
The focus is not on what you want to happen for you but on the kind of person you want to be, the contribution you want to make and the attitude you want to face life with, no matter what happens.
Simply having a goal is not enough to ensure your life changes and stays changed. Spending time thinking about and visualizing the person you intend to be, and turning those ideas into concrete, sustainable actions, can change how meaningful those efforts feel.
