The Wife Before

by Shanora Williams

when Roland asked me to marry him five months after moving in with him, I said yes.

We were living a dream, so by the time I had room to think, it was already too late.

Girl what

“I own a mansion just outside of Sageburg. There are less eyes there.

But I was sure there was more to Roland that I didn’t know.

a burgundy shed. I frowned at it. There were two windows on either side and a rocky path led to it.

“What’s that for?” I asked, pointing at the shed.

“Melanie’s,” was all he said and I frowned, confused. “It was her she-shed.

She didn’t want to move here at all, at first. I met her in North Carolina.”

“Yeah. She lived in Raleigh, so it didn’t really snow much there.”

She left her hometown and everything else behind to be with him.

How the hell was I supposed to compete with that? How was I supposed to be better than the wife before?

Why did these photos suddenly concern me?

had this unsettling feeling rooted deep in my gut.

number “1” engraved on the spine in gold. The journals were thick,

word Confessions embedded in a threadlike gold font.

Before I knew it, I was completely riveted.

When did everything between me and Roland go wrong? I’ve been asking myself this a lot lately.

“If a man looks back when you meet him, he’s interested.”

And that’s when I fell in love with him. He was so bold. So daring. So confident. So . . . perfect. And he was one hell of a kisser.

But I had so many questions. Why was she asking when her marriage went wrong? How could it have gone wrong?

They were happy and in love. He loved her and she loved him, right?

Had Roland read them? Had his mother? Had anyone?

She was a voracious reader.”

“Why so many questions about her tonight?”

Miley is my sister . . . and she has issues. A lot of them.

Miley would have taken one look at Roland and ruined everything good that we had.

And as promised I checked on her every single day, but I didn’t tell Roland about it. Nor had I told him I even had a sister in town.

“And it says you’ve been making monthly payments to Stone Creek Apartments. Wanna tell me about that?”

You’ve been so absent lately, coming home late, not answering your phone, and whenever you do, you always sound like you’re too busy to talk to me.”

She has an addiction problem.

I’d only just met his cousin and knew nothing about him.

“You don’t want that guy to move in, do you?” Miley asked. “No, I don’t.”

Drugs weren’t the only thing Miley was addicted to. She was also addicted to love.

“Roland tells me you two were like brothers. What was that like?”

His momma and mine had an on-going feud that I never understood.

But she became distant and I don’t want that with you, Samira.

And now look at her. Dead.

I was thinking of making digital prints and selling them online.

You are a much better wife to him. Nicer on the eyes too.”

After the way Yadira looked at me, I decided not to go back into the mansion with the journals.

“You found them?”

“Why else would you be following me around? Interrogating me? Gaslighting your sister? Just admit to me and to yourself that you want me—that you’ve wanted me since I first showed up.” “I don’t want you.” “Well, I want you.” “Why?”

you need to be gone.

Did Dylan have something to do with Melanie driving over that cliff? Did he do something to her?

Right! I feAr he did

“What do I get out of it?” I clasped his face in my hands. “Me.” “But you’re not mine. You’re Roland’s.”

But I noticed that as the days passed and shifted into weeks, Roland was changing. He was becoming bitter,

Every single guy was like this, even my own husband.

our connection had changed. Or maybe I had changed.

I was no longer in love with Roland.

He was just a man lying next to me, one I didn’t know anymore and one I didn’t want to learn about again.