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“That’s why it’s a riddle,” said Cleo. “Someone else being in the hole with you means you’re no longer in the hole.”
Why did she feel the need to make everyone, even this waiter, like her? What a thing it must be to be indifferent to indifference.
She had not yet managed the art of being alone in public unselfconsciously, of feeling that she could watch rather than be watched. She’d tried to explain this to Frank, that life in public for her happened from the outside in.
My mother is like a hummingbird in that if she stops moving, even for a moment, she will surely die.
I wonder what came first, the jackets or the relationship.
day. If that means I do not say anything for the rest of the day, or every day thereafter, so be it.
“I should have known she wasn’t right for me,” Levi says. “When she designed our band flyer using Comic Sans.”
She wanted someone to tell her who to be.
“People who feel the need to say ‘I’m fine’ are never fine, sweetheart,”
“What do you do not to feel sad?” I ask. “I let myself feel sad.”
I need to make money. I need to write today. I need to clean the bathroom. I need to eat something. I need to quit sugar. I need to cut my hair. I need to call Verizon. I need to savor the moment. I need to find the library card. I need to learn to meditate. I need to try harder. I need to get that stain out. I need to find better health insurance. I need to discover my signature scent. I need to strengthen and tone. I need to be present in the moment. I need to learn French. I need to be easier on myself. I need to buy organizational storage units. I need to call back.
“We break. We put ourselves back together. The cracks are the best part. You don’t have to hide them.”
“Do you know the word humiliate comes from the Latin root humus, which means ‘earth’? That’s how love is supposed to feel.” “Like hummus?” “Like earth. It grounds you. All this nonsense about love being a drug, making you feel high, that’s not real. It should hold you like the earth.”
It was a relief to live from the inside out at long last.
But the people who did get that love, they grew up to be different from us. More secure. Maybe they’re not as shiny or successful as you and I feel we have to be. But it’s not because they’re not interesting. They just don’t feel they have to do the tap dance, you know? They don’t have to prove themselves all the time to be loved. Because they always were.”