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Thank you for raising our standards from “oh, flowers and chocolates are nice” to “bring me the heads of my enemies.”
“You’re fucking wrong if you think that. You’re not ruined. You’re strong as hell. You’re a queen, with four men who would all get on our knees for you. We wouldn’t want you so damn bad if you weren’t steel all the way through, baby girl. You’re not. Fucking. Ruined.”
Like we’re just two people trying to bind ourselves together closer than our physical bodies will let us get.
“You’re not broken. You’re a fucking warrior, through and through. You hear me, goddammit? You’re strong enough to survive this.”
It’s like a flame, burning bright enough to cut through the dark and lead me back to where I’m supposed to be. With them.
Knox snorts at that. “That’s what you have us for, little fox. We did research while you were knocked out.” “We?” Ash asks, looking up at him with a raised eyebrow. “Is that your new nickname for me?”
“Because you have to hold on to those good memories just as hard as the bad ones. They exist too. Right alongside the bad. They’re yours as much as all the awful, shitty ones are.”
“Wow. That’s very Zen of you,” I tease. “You’re like a psychotic, murderous Winnie the Pooh.”
“First, breakfast,” Knox says, plopping down at the kitchen table with his plate of food. “Then murder.”
Pleasure and pain. Light and dark. He helps me find both sides of myself.
“Don’t just pile the shit up like that. Have you never packed a car before?” “Well excuse the fuck out of me for not having played dead body Tetris in a trunk before, Knox. If it all gets there, what does it matter?”
Let the whole fucking world know. River is ours. Ours to protect. Ours to worship. Our fucking queen.
He’d be in pain, I’d be in heaven.
Maybe I can have what I want. Maybe that future can really be ours. For the first time in what feels like a long time, I let myself do something that feels more wild and dangerous than anything else I’ve ever done. I let myself hope.
Nothing can take her from me. Nothing and no one. I’m never letting her go.
