A Throne of Ruin (Deliciously Dark Fairytales, #2)

by K.F. Breene

They’re males. They get confused which head is for thinking and do stupid shit. As females, we need to set them right.

“One day I’m going to bring my axe, and then how cheerful and zippy will you be, huh?” Stop talking to a tree. It’s enchanted, not alive, my animal grumbled.

Do you know what’s getting old? Your eggs. Best get that big alpha dick up in your cumquat so you won’t prove that red-headed wankstain right by dying old and alone.

“You are truly a remarkable specimen, Finley. The goddess sang when she made you. You are perfect in every way. You will never want for a home or protection. We will provide it, always. This I swear. The man has his own agenda, but it will never come between me and my oath to you.”