Such Sharp Teeth

by Rachel Harrison

There’s no winning. The trauma is either your fault or it’s a gift. It’s either You should have done this to stop it or Look what good has come of it! If you don’t get over it, why can’t you get over it? Why can’t you get past it or learn how to cope? Or if you do find some way to move on with your life in a socially acceptable manner, then you’re so brave and so strong, and aren’t you amazing? Let’s applaud you for moving forward while there’s a knife at your back.

It isn’t fair that I have to live with this, but I have to live. I’m resilient. My strength doesn’t come from the bad things that have happened to me. It defies those things. It’ll be all right. No matter what, I’ll be all right.

“You can’t free yourself of pain by causing pain. If you don’t take measures to control yourself, all you’ll do is cause pain. There’s no relief in destruction. I think you know that.”