Taking him in awakened my true self. My oshi dragged out of me something I’d given up on—something I normally pushed down and turned a blind eye to for the sake of survival. That was why I had to try to interpret him, to understand. Through getting to know his existence, I tried to sense my own. I cherished the movements of his soul. And when I danced, trying with all my might to catch up with him, I cherished my soul, too. Shout it out, my oshi said, with his body, Shout it loud. So I did. Like something that was tightly coiled had suddenly been freed and knocked down everything around it,
...more
