Hocus Pocus

by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

BERGERON’S EPITAPH FOR the planet, I remember, which he said should be carved in big letters in a wall of the Grand Canyon for the flying-saucer people to find, was this: WE COULD HAVE SAVED IT, BUT WE WERE TOO DOGGONE CHEAP. Only he didn’t say “doggone.”

I NOW STAND behind that statement 100 percent. All nations bigger than Denmark are crocks of doo-doo.

ANOTHER FLAW IN the human character is that everybody wants to build and nobody wants to do maintenance.

She asked me, “What makes so many Americans proud of their ignorance? They act as though their ignorance somehow made them charming.”