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There may be a lot of things I’m not good at, thought Vimes, but at least I don’t treat the punctuation of a sentence like a game of Pin the Tail on the Donkey…
“Er…‘Always take into consideration the fact that you might be dead wrong,’ sir?”
Good advice.
“Do you need an excuse to have a war?” said Nobby. “I mean, who for? Can’t you just say, ‘You got lots of cash and land but I’ve got a big sword so divvy up right now, chop chop?’ That’s what I’d do,” said Corporal Nobbs, military strategist. “And I wouldn’t even say that until after I’d attacked.” “Ah, but that’s ’cos you don’t know about politics,” said Colon.
“Well, that’s society for you, I’m afraid,” said Carrot. “Everything is dumped on the people below until you find someone who’s prepared to eat it. That’s what Mr. Vimes says.”
Trickle down economics in Ankh-Morpork.
“War, Vimes, is a continuation of diplomacy by other means,” said Lord Rust. “As you would know, if you were really a gentleman.”
71-hour Ahmed was not superstitious. He was substitious, which put him in a minority among humans. He didn’t believe in the things everyone believed in but which nevertheless weren’t true. He believed instead in the things that were true in which no one else believed. There are many such substitions, ranging from “It’ll get better if you don’t pick at it” all the way up to “Sometimes things just happen.”
“Fortune favors the brave, sir,” said Carrot cheerfully. “Good. Good. Pleased to hear it, captain. What is her position vis à vis heavily armed, well prepared and excessively manned armies?” “Oh, no one’s ever heard of Fortune favoring them, sir.” “According to General Tacticus, it’s because they favor themselves,” said Vimes.
Funny how that works.
‘Give a man a fire and he’s warm for a day, but set fire to him and he’s warm for the rest of his life.’
I want this stitched on a pillow.
Historically, sir, Klatch isn’t so much an empire as an argument.”
‘If you would seek war, prepare for war.’” “I believe, my lord, the saying is ‘If you would seek peace, prepare for war,’” Leonard ventured. Vetinari put his head on one side and his lips moved as he repeated the phrase to himself. Finally he said, “No, no. I just don’t see that one at all.”
I don't either.
I’m supposed to keep the peace, I am! If I kill people to do it, I’m reading the wrong manual!”
“The war, captain, never happened. It was a…misunderstanding.” “Never happened?” said Vimes. “People got killed!” “Quite so,” said Lord Vetinari. “And this suggests, does it not, that we should try to understand one another as much as possible?”
“Really? Men marched away, Vimes. And men marched back. How glorious the battles would have been that they never had to fight!” He hesitated, and then shrugged. “And you say bought and sold? All right. But not, I think, needlessly spent.”
