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A smart alpha doesn’t take something shared from the heart and say, “You don’t feel what you feel. You don’t think what you think.” That’s how you teach folks to lie to your face. So I say, “Okay.”
“Why don’t you, uh, put her out on the porch?” Alfie says. “Since it’s bothering her in here.” Put me on the porch? Like a dog? Dermot cackles. “He can’t do that. You can tell you young pups aren’t mated. You don’t know shit.” Killian’s wandering fingers are now fiddling with the tip of my braid. “He’s right. I can’t let you out of my sight,” he says low.
I’m not going to sleep with him. Just because he let me keep my phone, and he’s been decent for a few hours, doesn’t change the fact that he’s ruined my life.
And we’re both adults. We have pasts. It’s normal. “You don’t have to ask. I’m telling you. You don’t have to worry. Even if you never let me in, Una, I’m not gonna disrespect you. I’m in.”
And also, holy crap, Killian Kelly just admitted to me that he’s a virgin.
I snap again. He needs to listen. “Una, I’m not sure you know what you’re doing,” he says in a very rational tone which makes me want to rip off his face.
Somehow—and I don’t understand, but it’s true anyway—the wound is a lot older than a few days. The hurt goes back to long ago before I can remember. And that doesn’t make sense, but it’s real.
A light thrumming begins near the root of the bond, and I quickly turn my back. But not before I see the black band around his wrist. It’s my missing hair tie.
“Well, what?” “You called me. I came.” “I didn’t, and you know it. I was telling you to knock it off.” I cock my head. “How was I supposed to know that? Felt like a ‘come here’ tug to me.” “It’s never gonna be a ‘come here’ tug.” “Never’s a long time.”
My mate is so beautiful. So delicate, and so ornery.
She owns me, and that makes her the most powerful wolf in the five packs. And I don’t think she has a clue.
“You don’t need to win an alpha challenge. An alpha belongs to you.”
My wolf growls. “Stop that,” she snaps. My wolf immediately offers a conciliatory whine. Sweet Fate. This is going to get out of hand.
I nibble my bite mark, and she shivers. “You belong to me, shy girl. You know that right?”
She’s got to know, but it can’t hurt to say out loud. Females need words. Even I know that.
“We sell honey and herbs. It’s not fight club. It’s a farmer’s market.” “You’re not that naïve. You can’t be.”
purloined
If it comes down to it, I will beg this female. I will give her anything she wants. I am weak for her, and I don’t give a damn.
I know that just because you forbid a thing does not mean it is not done. It means it’s done in secret.
“Alpha doesn’t pity me. Alpha belongs to me.” Hell, yeah, I do.
She wants a pound of flesh. Drag her out so I can kill her. I love how her wolf doesn’t hesitate to boss my ass around. She knows how it is.
rend
Sometimes the choice isn’t between right and wrong. It’s between the bad and the less bad.
She is the one. Fate saved her for me. To be mine alone. The reward for all the sacrifice,
My heart explodes in pure joy, and then I panic. She’s not moving. Her eyes are closed. I slap her cheek gently, and then with a sharp tap. Oh, Fate. I broke her. What do I do?
“There’s no rule that females have to save themselves for their mates,” I say out loud, test if it has the ring of truth. “This isn’t the old world.”
“You don’t have a choice. Do you want to protect your mate?” “I will. No one touches her. Ever again.”
“I’m not a thing. I’m not ruined ‘cause I’ve been used.”
And he saved himself for me. Kind of. And he apologized to me sincerely. And he remade my nest. And he’s a backwards Neanderthal who loses his marbles when he finds out a grown ass woman had a lover or two. Did he think I was home crocheting all this time? I mean, I was. A lot. My escapades were few and far between.
And I know what he felt when he sank inside me. The overwhelming awe. He felt at peace. All the noise faded, and there was nothing but my breath, my soft cries. His soaring heart. I am his reward.
And Killian didn’t even mean to change everything. It’s just when you start insisting that folks behave decently to each other—I guess it kind of snowballs.
I bet reality is a lot different than sitting in a basement, blowing off steam about how bitches rule everything these days, and someone should do something about it.
aberration
braggadocio,
derision.
smote
I’m not his to do with as he pleases. He is mine.
This is so weird. We’ve known each other all our lives, we’re connected by a bond as real as muscle and bone, and in some ways, I’m still the nerd at the front of the bus, and he’s the cool kid in the very back seat. And he just said “pull out.”
“I feel what I feel. But it’s not on you.
“Everything I’ve ever done, I’ve done for you, Una Hayes.”
He’s going to lose it. We’ve been together for eighteen months, and relationships are hard. Especially with males who have always gotten their way and previously only used one way to settle an argument.
“Where am I gonna sit, Una?” “Sit on this.” I flip him the middle finger.
Handling Killian Kelly isn’t magic. It’s all tenacity, an ability to ignore nonsense, and the willingness to tell him no a few times a day for his own good.
Killian is not an easy male to live with, but loving him comes as natural as breathing.
“Hey, don’t threaten me with a good time.”
“I’d do anything for you. You’re the reason, Una.” “For what?” I know, but I want to hear him say it. “Everything. I love you, shy girl.” “I love you, too, mate.”
