Saints for All Occasions

by J. Courtney Sullivan

Then you got a phone call, and the world took on a different shape.

In the movie “Sweet Home Alabama”, Melanie Smooter is crying at the grave of her old hound dog and says something along the lines of, “you were always there when the world went pear shaped”. I’ve always loved the description of the shape of the world shifting because of an event, and so this line resonated with me.

Motherhood was a physical act as much as an emotional one. It took every part of you.

“There are as many paths to God as there are souls on earth,”

Isn’t this a lovely thought? Especially to someone who was raised in the south, where God in a very certain way is pushed on you, it’s a particularly beautiful sentiment, and comforting when someone is still trying to define their spirituality.

It was amazing that you did not become your grief entirely, and walk around leaking it everywhere. It could lie dormant inside you for days, weeks, years. You could seem a perfectly whole person to everyone you met. Without warning, grief might poke you in the ribs, punch you in the gut, knock the wind out of you. But even then, you seemed just fine. The world went on and on.

It wasn’t right that you could only understand your parents’ pain once you’d experienced the things they had,