John Dies at the End (John Dies at the End, #1)

by David Wong

He needed safety and I needed some kind of familiar comfort. I’m not sure how we decided on Denny’s but that’s where we wound up.

Sorry, Dave. My grandpa used to tell me, toward the end when he was going crazy, that talking through a dog ain’t like talking through a sausage.

Shitload said, “His name is Korrok the Slavemaster from the eighth plane, also known in some realms as Baa’aaa’aaa’aab and in others as the Lord Zanthk All-Bzzki’l Shadd’uuul’l L’luuu’ddahs L’ikzzb-lla Khtnaz.”

And so, feeling like men trying to work a jigsaw puzzle blindfolded and using only our butt cheeks to grip the pieces, we left.

“Eh, it didn’t work out. Turned out he was dead the whole time. He didn’t even know it. He was a semi-solid astral body.” “I hate it when they do that.”

I tried to think of the best, most soothing way to turn her down and said, “Sure.”