The Well of Lost Plots (Thursday Next, #3)

by Jasper Fforde

We had a similar problem with Merlins. We’ve had aged-male-bearded-wizard-mentor types coming out of our ears for years.”

Books may look like nothing more than words on a page, but they are actually an infinitely complex imaginotransference technology that translates odd, inky squiggles into pictures inside your head.

After all, reading is arguably a far more creative and imaginative process than writing; when the reader creates emotion in their head, or the colors of the sky during the setting sun, or the smell of a warm summer’s breeze on their face, they should reserve as much praise for themselves as they do for the writer—perhaps more.”

The atmosphere in the room was so thick with dramatic clichés you could have cut it with a knife.

“Was it da Vinci who said,” suggested the horse helpfully, “that anyone who quotes authors in discussion is using their memory, not their intellect?”

Anything devised by man has bureaucracy, corruption and error hardwired at inception, m’girl.

“Do you know what happened when they tried to upgrade SCROLL?” said Bradshaw. “The system conflict wiped out the entire library at Alexandria—they had to torch the lot to stop it spreading.”

“Caution is sometimes an undervalued commodity,”

The leader was identified by his dental records—why he had them on him, no one was quite sure.

He was just trying to get me to repeat “irrelevant benevolent elephant” when Gran woke up with a yell shouting, “The French! The French!”

turned into a haven for autograph hunters! We pursue the truth here, not celebrities!” There was dead silence. “But if you wouldn’t mind. . . ,” said the King, passing down his notebook to Rochester and adding quietly, “It’s for my daughter.” “And your daughter’s name?” asked Rochester, pen poised. “Rupert.”

“You would have thought that that first had had had had good occasion to be seen as had, had you not? Had had had approval but had had had not; equally it is true to say that that that that had had approval but that that other that that had not.”

David Copperfield, unlike Pilgrim’s Progress, had had had, had had had had. Had had had had TGC’s approval?”

Failure concentrates the mind wonderfully. If you don’t make mistakes, you’re not trying hard enough.”

some would say that the hero of any story is the one who changes the most.