The Reunion

by Kiersten Modglin

On one hand, I wanted to show them all what had become of me. I wanted them to know I’d made something of myself.

On the other hand, I was in no hurry to see anyone I’d gone to high school with. In fact, I’d considered not coming at all. I didn’t want to. If it wasn’t for the nagging need to face what happened, face everyone again, I might not have.

I’m not sure if my husband will be able to make it or not.” It was a lie. He wasn’t coming. Why didn’t I feel self-assured enough to say that? It was this place, I knew it. No longer was I an adult, a mom, a wife, a bestselling author who toured the world and signed autographs for thousands. Here, I was eighteen all over again. Reliving the worst night of my life.

Being in a hotel alone with Sam was a bad enough idea. Drinking alone in a hotel with Sam was even worse. I knew my husband wouldn’t have cared. He trusted me implicitly, and I’d never given him a reason not to, but being back in this place was like stepping into the past.

I didn’t trust myself.

At eighteen, I’d been all sharp angles and bony limbs. Now, I was filled out. I was a good forty pounds heavier than I’d been before, but the weight suited me. It was the weight of happiness, I thought. A sign that I was accepted and loved, just as I was. Why, then, back in this place, was I second-guessing everything? Why did I feel the need to pinch the lumps on my hips or cringe at the stretch marks on my thighs? I hated the way being back here felt.

In a way, it was easier to be in this place with Sam. I felt safe with him, maybe safer than with anyone else. On

the other hand, being with him just made me miss her. It was always the three of us. At least, until it wasn’t.

I had everything I wanted, but somehow it all felt a bit lackluster. A dream is its shiniest when it’s still inside your head.

Sam and Grant had

always had a bit of a strained relationship. I knew that was part of the reason we’d grown apart, but it wasn’t as if they were enemies anymore. They just didn’t have anything in common.

I’d tried to tell both him and Jamie my concerns and they’d been dismissed.

Why couldn’t anyone but me see what was happening?

We aren’t fighting. She just…outgrew me.”

My first true heartbreak was coming from the loss of a friend.

I remembered Grant’s warnings before about never posting my location online until I’d left the place.

Perhaps Grant was right. I’d have to be careful about posting my location from now on. Anna seemed harmless enough, but next time, it could be much worse.

That’s the burden parents face, isn’t it? When we’re with them, we take it all for granted. We wish for time away. We wish for a moment of peace. Then, as soon as we’re away, supposed to be enjoying our peace, we wish to be right in the middle of it all again. Childhood is both very long and very short and, as parents, there’s nothing we’re more aware of than that.

Then again, what if part of the reason Grant wasn’t coming was because everyone had revolted against him for moving on, for marrying me?

It was impossible, wasn’t it? None of his old friends would even attend our wedding, but that was unrelated… They’d always hated me. It had nothing to do with that night. Grant would’ve told me if he thought they were still holding grudges. He’s the one who swore it had all died down finally.

I knew the only reason they were talking to me now was because I was Cait Du Bois, not because I was Cait.

I followed her out the door and toward everything bad that was getting ready to happen. I didn’t see a single part of it coming.

You don’t have to be the one throwing

the flames in order to help spread the fire.”

“I’m her ticket to what she wants. I’m starting to think she never cared about me at all.”

Whoever Jamie was before, she’d turned into one of them.

I should’ve felt relieved, knowing she was gone and I could relax again, but I didn’t feel relieved. I didn’t feel safe. Why had she left so quickly? Where did she go? More importantly, would she come back?

“New doesn’t necessarily equal better.”

I couldn’t deny the feelings Sam still gave me. A sort of comfort no one else had ever provided. Grant was exhilarating, even now. Sam was cozy. Like an old, reliable

sweater you could easily slip into again and again. At the end of the day, I’d chosen the little black dress that made me feel amazing. The one I loved wearing out of the house. The one that made everyone see me, notice me, envy me.

But the sweater was always there. And on hard days, I still craved the sweater. Even if I rarely...

“Because seven months ago, I asked you to choose

me, but I realized I never fully chose you.” He swallowed, his deep green eyes meeting mine. “So now I am. I’m all in, Cait. Putting myself out there for you. I’m choosing you.”

It’s not your job to make his life okay, Cait.

It’s not your job to protect him from life.

living in fear isn’t living.”

Wasn’t it normal to want new, exciting things? It was why people cheated or threw away

perfectly good items in exchange for a newer model. It didn’t make it right. It made me human, maybe. Selfish, definitely.

No matter how badly I needed to deny it, there was something between Grant and me.

Coming home was a reminder of all I’d lost.

Prom night was the last night any of us saw Jamie alive.

Jamie had died all those years ago in this very hotel. I saw her body. I attended her funeral. I was questioned for her murder. This woman might share some of her characteristics, but she wasn’t Jamie. It was impossible… Wasn’t it?

Thinking back, I probably would’ve married him to keep from hurting him. I would’ve lived my life in service of making sure he didn’t feel pain. Grant had saved me from that future,

Being with Sam felt safe. Being with Grant was anything but. Still, I felt happier with him than I’d ever felt with Sam.

I never wanted to see these people again. Specifically one of them. If I never saw Jamie again, I’d die happy.

Little did I know, I was going to get that wish. When we returned to school Monday morning, rumors of Jamie’s disappearance had already begun to circulate.

Below our faces, on our necks in red marker, someone had written the words BESTIES FOR LIFE in capital letters, then

crossed the phrase out and replaced it with a new one: MURDERER

Someone knew what I’d done ten years ago, and they were going to make

sure everyone else knew it, too.