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And I know Akio feels like home. Safe. Comfortable. Secure. No matter where I go or what I do, I am a boomerang; it’s him I think of; it’s him I want to return to. Is that love?
Who will live here now
that you are gone? Whose hands will stoke the fire? Forge the steel? Dye the cloth? Whose hands will tend the soil from which we grow?
“About … about expectations, and how much pressure that creates.”
I sip my water and try to forget how my broken heart still doesn’t beat quite right.
guess I secretly hoped Akio would move away, but not move on,
The truth will set you free and all that.
The more I tried to forget you, the more I remembered your smell, your smile, the way you made me feel like the sun grazing my skin.
I miss them both with an ache so acute it steals my breath.
“So love is a choice?”
“Love is many things, and it manifests at different times in different ways for people.
“Surprises are the salt of life. They make everything tastier,”
You’ve taught me it’s okay to succeed. You just can’t sacrifice your total happiness for it. You have to know what you want, at the end of the day.”
Plus, sometimes love is space.
It hurts to look at him. It hurts more not to see him.
It is so much easier to be led than to blaze your own trail. Actually, “blazing” sounds too easy. It is more rigorous than that. Pulling up weeds. Unearthing trees. Laying down gravel. It’s hard work becoming who you are. Is there really a right way to be a princess? A woman?
I love you, and you fight for the things you love.”
That I’d be cursed to watch you forever from afar.”
I see you shrinking smaller and smaller. Giving your time, your smiles, your
energy. Yet, it is not enough. They’ll have your bones, too.
Right now, we’re together. And I hope we stick. So that’s how we leave it. With hope.
Life is a poem. I’m going to write it.
