You Don't Want to Know: The grisly, jaw-dropping and most macabre moments from history, nature and beyond

by James Felton

Also, maybe for science or maybe just to keep things spicy, the scientists began throwing the kittens up into the air to see how that would affect the results. As it turns out, in the early days it wasn’t a lot. The problem for the kittens was that they were in fact kittens, and hadn’t learned to right themselves yet. For the first twenty-five days, both the blinded cats and the lucky cats (here ‘lucky’ means ‘thrown from heights a lot but while in possession of eyeballs’) righted themselves about as much as each other, which is to say not at all. They would be dropped to the ground, twat themselves, then wait around for their next mid-morning twatting. Around the 25-day mark, the cats did begin to right themselves as they went down and from then on had a nice soft landing on their feet, but to say this in the defence of the scientists is like defending a criminal charged with repeated GBH on the grounds that the victim got used to the twattings. The blinded cats righted themselves in the air, but weren’t as good at the final landing part. From this, the scientists learned that cats’ righting mechanism operates largely through their sense of balance, with vision playing a role in the landing.27 The applications of which are fucking non-existent.